


Out Of The Woods

by LilismilemeSPN



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Flashbacks, Fluff, Hogwarts, Hogwarts Sixth Year, I just wanted something fluff, M/M, Marauders, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Marauders Friendship (Harry Potter), NaNoWriMo 2020, Prompt Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-16 07:41:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 38,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29697267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilismilemeSPN/pseuds/LilismilemeSPN
Summary: The Marauders encounter a baby unicorn during the full moon. It's cute and harmless then Remus gets anxious, Lily might not want to yell at James anymore and Sirius would very much like for everyone to stop having thoughts and questioning everything.Disclaimer: Harry Potter characters are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Lily Evans Potter & Severus Snape, Remus Lupin & Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black & James Potter, Sirius Black & Remus Lupin & Peter Pettigrew & James Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Kudos: 18





	1. Where is the unicorn now, Potter?

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic! Yay me. I'm a bit terrified posting this but my love for the Marauders motivates me. I hope you enjoy it. 
> 
> This fic was based on a few prompts that I'll post at the end! Thank you to my Lindou, my NaNo friends and my Alexis for getting me into writing again and reading it first.

** Friday afternoon **

** Gryffindor’s Common Room **

‘A unicorn?’ Lily asks, incredulity creeping over her face, just enough to abate the anger overwhelming her. ‘I.. what..’, she stutters at loss for words.

She brings both her arms at her side, closing her eyes and takes a deep breath reaching for control. In and out, Evans, in and out. Much more controlled, much much better. Opening her eyes again, she stares at the boy in front of her. Disheveled as if he had just strolled out of bed, glasses slightly askew, brown hazel eyes almost dark with mischief that betrays the expression of good-natured innocence he’s currently going for and a suppressed laugh still hanging on his lips. 

‘Where?’ she breathes out. ‘Where is the unicorn now, Potter?’ Because if she doesn’t get to the bottom of this, her week-end will be ruined by the papers she won’t finish on time and there’s absolutely no way she’ll spend Saturday working on her Arithmancy homework because of James Potter and his stupid, stupid unicorn. Nobody mentioned a horn so she is still skeptical on that one and not only because it’s coming out of Potter’s mouth.

‘You believe me?’ He asks, jaw dropping and shocked face. He’s so surprised that she believes him, he forgets to deny the facts again. Coming back to his senses, he adds quickly, ‘I mean, I don’t know anything about what you’re accusing me of but from the description you just gave me, it sounds like it was a unicorn.’ And puts his hands in his pockets. 

‘I don’t have time for this. I just spent half my morning and lunch break being told by Second years about the big horse they saw near Hagrid’s cabin last night. It was silver and almost glowing, they said. And then what else did they see? Two Gryffindor students trying to lure the beast inside the forest. Why in Merlin’s name would you and Sirius be luring a unicorn back into the forest, at night, after curfew?!’ She pauses to breathe, ‘Is this another prank of yours?’

‘You sound upset. Calm down, Evans.’ he asks, raising both of his palms up, trying to appease her. ’First, how do you know it was Sirius and I? I’m somewhat certain no one gave names and -’

‘You’re hardly difficult to miss, Potter. Black too.’ she adds. ‘One black hair boy who probably never met a hairbrush in his life. Who also happens to be wearing glasses and the other had a ponytail!’ She’s not yelling yet but she’s very close to it. ‘Using a magical rope to draw it somewhere and disappearing behind the trees. The only reason they didn’t follow you is that they got scared of the dark and they had the good sense to remember that the forest is dangerous. Unlike some people apparently.’

‘Is this really what they said? About the hairbrush, I mean?’ James asks slightly concerned. 

‘I will find out what the two of you were doing last night - might be the three of you actually, Peter probably was hiding somewhere nearby, wasn’t he? And it better not involve scaring people or mistreating any animal! You’re lucky Professor McGonagall hasn’t heard any of this already.’ she adds flapping her arms around with frustration. 

‘Mistreating any animal? What kind of wizards do you take us for, Evans? We’d never hurt a soul, much less a unicorn! Merlin’s beard! Sometimes I think you give us way too much evil credit for our sake. That’s a lot of prejudices, you know?’ He glares at her for a second, affronted by the very idea of her picturing him abusing a unicorn. 

Mechanically he starts removing hair locks from his forehead and before she has any time to say another word, he adds: ‘Alright, alright. This should not deny nor confirm anything but I’m willing to cooperate for your immediate peace of mind.’ 

Lily huffs and crosses her arms over her chest. Satisfied that she doesn’t interrupt him, he continues:

‘The unicorn wasn’t part of a prank, so you can calm down. Rest assured you won’t ever hear of it again. It was a … a mistake. We were merely testing something out and being a tiny wee bit too curious about something we read. One thing led to another and well… Unicorns are not the brightest creatures. Too trustworthy. I am of course a trustworthy person, but I won’t insult you by pretending Sirius ever was one.’ He takes a deep breath and shrugs warily. 

Lily continues to glare daggers in his general direction but her breathing slows down a bit and she sighs quite dramatically for effect. Talking to Potter always seems to get her so frustrated and angry she forgets to breathe. Curious though, she risks asking more than she should: ‘You read something about unicorns and you decided to go ahead in the Forbidden Forest at night, by yourselves and find one, didn’t you?’

James doesn’t even try to deny anything else. She’s calm enough that he thinks she wouldn’t hex him right now but he can’t be sure. Not telling the entire truth is a way for him to not put her in a difficult situation if she ever has to report anything in the next few hours but lying would be insulting her and he’d rather not do that. She hates him enough as it is, he regretfully acknowledges, looking at her, appraising her bright green emerald eyes and wild fiery red hair that she failed to contain in a ponytail. Strands escaped their grip and she isn’t aware she’s blowing them away whenever she exhales grievance toward him. Her face, usually a pearly white, is currently coloured with pink at the cheeks, a colour she’s often showing around him. He knows he shouldn’t like the way her temper flares, especially when he’s the cause for it but he does. And that’s just a pity, really. Once he would like for her cheeks to get that pinky shade because she’s actually happy or excited to see him. One can always dream. 

‘Maybe. Look, no harm no fool. We fixed it. Everything. Whatever that was that we were doing’, and he’d like to know himself if he didn’t dream the whole thing, ‘And I am sorry. I am!’ he adds empathetically. ‘You know us, we never think too much before acting but we also try to be as discreet as possible, unless it is the most brilliant prank and we want everyone to know that it’s us, detention notwithstanding. We only ever put ourselves in harm's way - although a unicorn is far from being dangerous - so we apologise if these kids were taking a page out of our book and running wild past curfew.’ 

He comes closer as he speaks, reaching for the books she dropped on the table besides her, passing them back to her as a white flag and to remind her she has more important things to do than yelling at him. 

Lily eyes him then the books he’s holding between the two of them. His eyes turned brighter in the sunshine coming through the window when he came closer. His locks of loose hair are back on his brow, a tangled mess she picked on only because she feels irrationally exasperated by it. Half the boys in school are trying really hard for this look with hair potions and an unhealthy amount of gel when all James Potter has to do is take a shower or get out of bed. Why she feels anything about his hair - on behalf of the other boys obviously - she couldn’t say.

She takes the books, gathers herself and decides that he’s honest enough. She doesn’t approve. He’s an idiot. Sirius Black is also an idiot. Bloody Marauders! But there doesn’t seem to be anything else she can do now. Besides it sounds like the unicorn is probably safely back in the forest and she doesn’t want to hear anything about it anymore, nor does she have the patience to deal with anything else right now. 

‘You and Black. Detentions on Saturday morning. 5 points taken each for putting yourselves, the unicorn and the second years in some sort of danger.’

‘Can it be after the Quidditch training?’ he dares to ask.

‘Before.’

‘But we train at 6AM. Whoever will have to deal with our detentions might hate you.’ he offers. ‘Unless it’s you of course.’ He knows he’s trying his luck but he also can’t cancel Quidditch practices. He would never hear the end of it from Sirius. 

Lily sighs. ‘Fine. After practice. I’ll come up with something or ask every single soul who curses your very existence for inspiration. That’s a lot of people I can ask for help so there’s that.’ 

She starts turning away from him and his stupid smirk. But he bypasses her and says, ‘Thanks, Lily. You’re the best of the best and I promise to never ever get caught again. I’ll find a way to make it up to you. I -’

‘You won’t ask me to go out with you for the next Hogsmead week-end and you will stop talking. Yes, I approve. Go away, Potter.’ She stops him before pointedly looking at the door behind him. 

His grin gets wider and she catches her breath, silently cursing it. ‘Right. Right. Bye, Evans.’ And out he is. She exhales again, leaving the room half wondering about the unicorn’s fate. 

* * *

* * *

**Friday evening**

**Marauders Dorm**

One hand on the doorknob and ready to push in, Remus stops to soak in and interpret what is happening behind the door before he has to open it. Doing magic and being a wizard in training, in an ancient castle lost somewhere in Scotland is strange enough, he thinks. Being a wizard werewolf teenager who can sense emotions pouring out of your dorm-mates even before you see them is bloody mental. But that’s his life. Remus sniffs the air and takes stocks: someone is aggravated, someone is frustrated, someone is unsure and a little worried and everyone is hungry. That alone should be an omen of doom. Remus enters the room and three pair of eyes look up at him in sync. After a bit, James sighs and relaxes into his spot on his bed, long legs stretched out before him and starts to toss his small quaffle into the air, a soft smile appears on his face while he follows it with his eyes. 

‘Hey there, Moony’, he says. 

Peter waves and he too seems to relax a little bit, mimicking James in posture and following the quaffle with his eyes. While Sirius flops his entire body dramatically on his own bed, head resting at a weird angle toward the foot, so that his long black hair fall down in a cascade and he’s glaring at Remus upside down. Well, if he had hoped that it didn’t have anything to do with him, he couldn’t anymore. 

‘What’s going on?’ he asks as he puts down books, journals and bags on his own bed, not looking at them anymore.

‘Lily knows about the unicorn and James is being an arse about it.’ says Sirius. Remus sighs. There was never any doubt which one of them was aggravated. 

‘Am not!’ counters James, catching the quaffle with both hands and glaring at Sirius. ‘It’s not my fault, you’re being predictably unhelpful and have no sympathy for my condition.’ he adds. 

‘Your condition!?’ yells Sirius, jumping up the bed and now half standing glaring back at James, ‘You said she didn’t rat us out and merely gave us detention and she didn’t even hex you. I, for one say that a day where she doesn’t hex you is a good day. There’s no need for sympathy here.’

James smashes the quaffle next to his leg on the bed. ‘Well, you could try a bit more empathy then! It is hard being in love with someone. It rather sucks to feel grateful for not being hexed by the love of your life. Aren’t I a lucky bloke!’ 

Sirius flops down again, ‘What do you want me to do about it? I didn’t make you fall in love with her. You did this to yourself or maybe she bewitched you! It’s not my fault either kids were running around while we were helping the poor creature. We saved that bloody unicorn. Twice. If you ask me, it’s Evans who has no sympathy. Nor empathy.’

Sirius has a point, Remus muses as he sits down on his own bed and listens to his friends’ banter. Not about Lily Evans and James Potter's doomed if not entertaining relationship but about saving the unicorn. The truth, he has to admit, is that the whole unicorn disaster may not be entirely his friends’ fault and mostly his own. Would Lily have empathy for him if she had known that everything started during the past full moon when he was a werewolf running wild with his three animagi friends in the dark forest? Remus tries to make sense of everything and fails but here is what he knows: 

One, he should have known the second his friends became Animagi that this would happen. He should have known that once the excitement of running around with a werewolf would become old news and a routine, they’d be looking for a bigger buzz. Especially when one animagus was Sirius Orion Bloody Black in dog form. Because Sirius in human form is already a menace, one doesn’t need much imagination for what he does or thinks or feels once he becomes Padfoot. 

Two, unicorns are dumb. They truly are. They are cute and majestic and smell really really good. Whether you are a wolf, a dog, a stag or a rat. But they’re dumb, he ponders as James throws the quaffle, the pillow and nearest book he can reach at Sirius. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short one and the next is mostly flashbacks of the unicorn event!


	2. What happens in the woods...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First Flashback of the unicorn encounter through Remus' POV. Another short one for now.

**Forbidden Forest**

**The night of the previous Full Moon**

_So here is how it all started: They were free, racing and playing, eating rabbits (the wolf and Padfoot), howling at the moon and feeling happy to be outside and in the woods. Until suddenly he had smelled it. The most exquisite scent he had ever had the chance to smell, in human and wolf form. Now, Remus doesn’t usually remember much from his time as the wolf. But this, he remembered upon waking up after he turned back. The scent was of fresh effervescent and clear rainwater, all mixed up with a sweet syrupy-like dream after taste (you could taste the smell. It’s how powerful this was) and the promise of being enveloped by a pure and delicate embrace. Content, peaceful and soothing. To this day, Remus doesn’t know if he would actually have bitten or eaten the poor creature if he had had the opportunity. But he was certainly called to it like he hadn’t been called to anything else before._

_The next part is fuzzy for Remus as the scent was overwhelming enough that the wolf lost itself in it but from what his friends told him, he zeroed in on it and went hunting. Padfoot became agitated enough too and both ran deeper in the forest. Apparently Wormtail was as inebriated by the smell as them but Prongs managed to keep control of his senses until they were much closer to the creature. He lost it then a bit too. He was brought back to earth by Padfoot growling, ready to jump and willing to play around. The wolf was another matter entirely. He wanted to catch the unicorn more than anything else and he lost no time. The unicorn was drinking calmly at the small clearing illuminated by the bright moon. It didn’t hear them coming. The wolf had stopped a few feet away to calculate his best course of action when the dog barked playfully._

_It did two things: The unicorn fled and the stag woke up from his trance, allowing James to take over. Everyone followed the unicorn in a mad chase that got them back on the original path. Until the wolf got tired of hunting and chasing and decided to attack. It jumped on the other animal who lost its footing and staggered backward, and he leaped, teeth out. Before getting knocked out by the stag in full force and full speed. The wolf flew down and caught himself by its claws, surprised and bleeding at its sides from the collision with the stag's enormous prongs. The unicorn didn’t move. The dog stopped and positioned itself between the stag and the wolf, uncertain. Luckily the shock also got him back to his human senses. He stopped seeing a wolf and a stag and started seeing Remus and James ready to fight and attack each other over the unicorn. James' protective attitude versus the wolf’s blood thirsty somewhat demeanour got Padfoot to instinctively realise the danger was to let the wolf attack. James came closer, confronting, wanting to deflect attention from the unicorn onto himself and Sirius came closer to the creature. He started barking, waking it up. Which worked. The unicorn stood up and fled. The wolf got on all fours ready to follow but got knocked down by the stag once more. The dog jumped on the wolf too and together they trashed around a bit, clawed and rolled away. Eventually the wolf focused on his attackers and after a while the bloodlust subsided and they were almost back to playing. Much of the night was then dedicated to coming back closer to the edge of the forest. Sending Wormtail to find the scent of the unicorn and showing them the opposite direction from it._

_The next morning, Remus didn’t understand the guilt in James' eyes or the torn look on Peter and Sirius' faces but once they were back in their dorm they explained everything.No harm no foul though. Well except from Remus’ ribs but the unicorn was safe, Remus would heal and they had met a mythical creature, he had thought nonchalantly. Almost killed it yes but it didn’t happen._

_Then at breakfast the following day, Sirius had said between two helping of eggs:_

_‘I wonder if it's still there.’_

_‘What?’ asked Peter._

_‘The unicorn.’ Sirius continued, ‘We went really deep in the forest this time but only because we smelled it. We weren’t that far to begin with and on familiar ground. It’s the one who was off course and closer than what is probably its usual path, right?’_

_‘Right’ added James putting down his fork. He was still unsettled by how violent he had had to be to stop the wolf and somewhat felt guilty when looking at Remus. ‘And what if it did? Do you think we ought to check before the next full moon?’ he continued._

_‘At the risk of sounding mad and all that, can I ask why it would be that bad if the.. the wol… if it got eaten or attacked?’ hit Peter, looking at them carefully. ‘It’s just that you kill things all the time. Rabbits and such, right? Padfoot does too. It’s bigger but it’s still predators and prays and nature. You know. Wilderness or whatever. And I’m not saying we should hunt for it or go looking for it or anything. But if it crosses our path again and we cannot avoid it, why would it be too bad to eat or kill it?’ he finishes, sitting straight and scanning his friends with uncertain eyes._

_The fact was that Remus, for all his nonchalance about the whole thing, was just doing what he did best after every full moon: avoid dealing with what the wolf may or may not have done. It used to be easier because at first, he was confined when he turned and he had nothing to do but hurt himself. There wasn’t any thought to give about why and what. He could see it all over his body by virtue of his many scars and if he thought of killing anyone but himself, he mostly forgot about it and had no one around to witness the werewolf’s bloodlust. But now that he was roaming free most full moons with his friends, yes, he killed rabbits and yes, they often had to coerce or trick him to stay within the safe path of the forest and away from the towns. Or the school. And he had been pretty happy to avoid thinking about what killing a unicorn in front of his friend would have meant for him._

_So Peter’s question wasn’t disgraceful. It was just very very unwelcome. Sirius of course was the first one to react._

_‘Yes, you are mad! Pete, how can you? We’re not… it’s a bloody unicorn! People don’t go around murdering mythical creatures.’ he almost yelled. Remus took his wand to cast a silencing spell._

_James, who was sitting in front of Sirius and next to Remus, stretched his arm and gripped Sirius fist. ‘Calm down, Padfoot.’ he said. ‘Wormtail, there’s a difference between a rabbit and a unicorn and that has nothing to do with its size. A unicorn.. a unicorn is powerful in more than strength. The one we met, I think it was young but still. I’ve read about it and Dad told me a bit but nothing good can come from eating it or you know.. drinking its blood.’_

_They all looked at Remus who shrunk somehow on himself with a mixture of shame and dread. ‘What does it do? Drinking unicorn blood?’ Remus asked even though he didn’t really want to know. ‘And how do you know it was young?’_

_‘It didn’t have a horn.’, answered Sirius, ‘Unicorns turn silver when they’re about two years old and grow their horn later on, remember? It still smelled bloody good and before anyone else goes around accusing you of being a monster for maybe wanting to get a chew at it, may I remind everyone that I also wanted a bite’, he adds glaring at Peter who rolled his eyes back at him. ‘You didn’t do anything different than any other predators would have done, Moony’._

_‘I am a monster, Sirius. We’ve established that. But the unicorn blood, what does it do?’ Insisted Remus._

_‘You are_ **_not_ ** _!’ Sirius’ glare focused on him and for a brief moment, Remus thought he was trying to mind control him into accepting this as fact._

_James’ grip got tighter around Sirius’ fist but he looked at Remus when he said, ‘Padfoot is right. We know what the wolf is and we know what he can do. But we also know you, Moony. That’s nonsense to think like that when we found a perfectly good solution to your furry little problem and no one was ever hurt.’_

_Remus looked up at him, anger bubbling - or was it self loathing? - and said:_

_‘Yes, like no one got hurt when Snape saw the wolf last year.’_

_In front of him, Sirius paled and Peter closed his eyes. James though, sighed and sat back, still holding Sirius fist but less rigidly. ‘We all know no one actually got hurt that day. And whatever might have happened, it would not have been the wolf’s fault. It was human stupidity’._

_‘Don’t tell him what the blood does. He’s about to go whip himself and not come out of his hole until the next full moon.’ Said Sirius, his entire body rigid with a storm of emotions. Remus knew he only ever said that to deflect his own emerging emotions. Better to be angry at Sirius who could and would fight him than to hate himself. Sirius had the means to win him over._

_‘I’m sorry, Padfood.’ he conceded, because he forgave Sirius about the Terrible Snape Incident a long time ago. ‘I’m not being fair. But neither are you when you’re trying to baby me and shield me from the truth either. Even if it means I’ll probably go and mope about it for a while. I read books. I can find the books on unicorns too, you know’._

_Remus looked intently in Sirius’ eyes to translate his determination and unease. Sirius hold his gaze and here it was. Sirius’ very own power of persuasion and deep unshakeable faith in his friends. In Remus. Remus thought that Sirius was never a pushover, or maybe he decided that outside of his family’s grasp he wouldn’t ever let anyone tame him and perhaps it explained why he’d always push Remus over the edge in everything. But he wondered if Sirius didn’t also pick on the fact that Remus was too kind, too passive and too prone to self loathing and sorrow for his own good. And decided to amp up the bantering, the teasing and the many ways he’d always grab his attention whether with an endless string of words or by never letting go of his gaze first. Trapping the boy and even the wolf sometimes, forcing them to play by his rules._

_Remus didn’t mind most of the time. It was nice to feel control being relinquished to something other than his lycanthropy and his many fears. At least Sirius was intense but good. Warm and always in search of satisfaction and gratification and challenging oneself to be better. To be better at pranks and mischief or better at school and Quidditch. To be the best possible friend and to be better at listening to what you need. Remus had no doubt that outside of Hogwarts, the boy would continue on this course in everything he’d ever attempt. Often Remus wondered if the universe putting Sirius Black in his life wasn’t a way to say sorry for all the other bad things that happened to him. He was immensely grateful._

_Remus exhaled first. And Sirius softly smiled, knowing he had won that staring contest. The former Heir of the Ancient and Noble House of Black relaxed and winked at him. He had long black hair at his shoulder, his front bangs were contained in a small ponytail with his large honest and clear grey eyes on a nobly handsome face. Yes, Remus thought. Grateful and slightly terrified of how much he felt for him._

_James let go of Sirius sensing that everyone calmed down enough for him to continue:_

_‘We don’t know that much ourselves and what I read wasn’t exactly detailed. But the gist of it is that drinking unicorn’s blood can curse you. It can help you survive if you’re close to death but at a great price and you wouldn’t be … well you wouldn’t be yourself again.’ Remus nodded still looking at Sirius as James continued. ‘Humans don’t feel the need to drink their blood and everyone knows that their horn and hair can be used in potions. We also know that they are supposedly very pure, very magical. So it doesn’t surprise me that there is a price for drinking their blood.’ He sighed before adding, ‘On the other hand, we have no idea how they’d affect a werewolf, them being magical creatures too.’_

_‘Alright.’ Remus swallowed and smiled weakly at his friend. ‘I guess before any of us go back looking for it, I should probably figure that out. It might be then that the wolf wouldn’t be in danger of anything.’_

_‘Sure.’ said Sirius, frowning. He tried to lean closer to Remus as if there wasn’t a whole table separating them. ‘But Moony, even if it doesn’t do much to the wolf, it might hurt you in your human form. I’d prefer to research it once we’re sure it’s not even a danger anymore. Out of here.’ The irony that the defenceless unicorn was a danger to the big bad wolf bent on hunting it, wasn't lost on Remus. But Sirius had a point and James’ firm nod meant that they would all be back in that forest and hunt the unicorn very soon no matter what he had to say about it._

* * *


	3. Piece by piece, like a Jigsaw puzzle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A wolfstar flashback and Sirius would prefer if everyone could focus on their next prank.

**Wednesday Evening**

**Hogwarts library**

_The library was pretty empty at that time of the evening. Most students would prefer the warmth and coziness of their common rooms. But Remus Lupin wasn’t most students. Sirius knew that Remus wasn’t here to study though. One glance at his friend’s posture was enough to conclude that a lot of dark thoughts had been thought and a lot of anguish was happening. Three books were opened along a dark journal and notebook onto which Remus was scribbling, his free hand forming a strong fist as if the boy was struggling to contain all his emotions in. Sirius silently sighed, taking stock of what he was about to deal with. Unruly mass of sandy blond hair hiding his brow and half of his frown, lips in a thin line, eyes dark and laser focused on the page of the book opened right in front of him, Remus is unconventionally attractive, mused Sirius. He had previously thrown his robes and sweater on a nearby chair, only wearing his white shirt and loosened house tie._

_Sirius went forward, moved the chair where the discarded items of clothing were lying back and half sat on the table, one of his long legs swinging and knocking on Remus’ chair. He dragged the closest book toward him and faked scanning it for any useful information. If Remus saw him or heard him, he didn’t show it._

_‘Pince wants me to remind you that the library closes in ten minutes’, said Sirius before his eyes caught the words “unicorn” and “fast” on the book. ‘So what did you find? Will you drop dead if the wolf drinks the unicorn blood? Or is it so pure it’ll wash away all of the sins and evil of the monstrous and deadly demon that is within?’ he teased, darkly._

_‘Jury’s still out. For all we know, it actually brings out the monster and my soul gets devoured. The wolf is all that’s left forevermore’, Remus answered back, grim and tired but still not looking up at Sirius._

_‘The more you read, the more you learn, the more you discover that you know nothing’, quotes Sirius. Remus’ head whipped up and incredulity spread on his face._

_‘Frankenstein? Really?’ he asked, amazed._

_Sirius closed the books and said ‘I had to learn about all the people who thinks they are monsters so I could speak Moony. Are you done?’ Remus let him do it, still unsettled. He came back to himself when Sirius reached for the journal and grabbed his hand mid movement._

_‘They are fast. The unicorns.’ he added when Sirius raised an eyebrow at him not letting go of the journal. ‘They… They are really fast. It says here that not a lot of things can catch them. Once they are fully grown that is. It also says that they are more trusting when they are young. And maybe a young unicorn’s blood won’t do much to the wolf. But at least we know that should the wolf…’ he swallowed and locked eyes with Sirius, ‘Should I encounter an adult one, it should be safe from me since they out-speed werewolves.’_

_Sirius nodded and turned his attention to the journal and the notebook which he closed and put away with the books. Slowly but firmly he brought the chair closer to Remus and sat on his clothes._

_‘Alright then’, Sirius didn’t let go of Remus’ gaze and grabbed his fisted hand. He started unlocking the fingers from their empty grip. ‘That’s one good thing. Might be why we don’t have more accounts of werewolves and unicorns dancing together under the full moon. Now, I get that it doesn’t change our predicament since we are dealing with a stupid baby unicorn at the moment and still need to figure out a way to get it far far away from us. But why are you looking like this?’_

_‘Like what?’ Whispered Remus trembling slightly._

_‘Like you’re about to explode into a million angry pixies. It feels like Moaning Myrtle is in the room, Moony.’ Said Sirius with reproach._

_Remus sighed and caught Sirius’ hand to hold it still and it seemed he was trying to convey as much as he could without using words. ‘It’s just the same, Padfoot. There is just so much I don’t know about my condition. You know how much I love research. I love figuring out things. Completing puzzles. Well, I am a puzzle that has no original picture. I don’t know what I’m supposed to look like. I don’t know what pieces fit and no amount of research is ever enough. No one cared enough to ask the questions. We know the basics but every experiences must be different. We just keep adding pieces that don’t fit because we don’t know how to make them fit.’_

_‘I know. But if we focus on this specific piece... You aren’t likely to meet that many unicorns, Moony.’ Comforted Sirius._

_‘Here you mean? Well no, but I’m hardly going to stay in Hogwarts forever. What happens afterward? I need to make sure now that wherever I will apparate to transform will be as secluded from people as possible. I just didn’t think I was going to be a danger to other magical beings. It was nice not being a threat to things that weren’t humans. Now I don’t even have that.’ Remus ended with, ‘I don’t want to go back in any cell, you know.’_

_Sirius inhaled sharply from fear and was deeply distressed by his friend's confession. He didn’t know what to say right away so he just squeezed Remus’ hand in comfort. After a few seconds, his mind caught one important thing Remus mentioned and he asked, ‘You want to apparate to remote forests?’_

_Remus nodded. ‘As soon I know how and can do it, yes. I’ve looked up for places where there are other werewolves sightings but it’s not really updated so I figured I’d ask Dumbledore before I leave school.’_

_Sirius startled and almost dropped Remus’ hand, ‘Wait, you want to run with other wolves? How do you know that they would be friendly? What about us?’ he rushed._

_‘I’m looking at options, Sirius. Do I want to risk meeting other werewolves? No. But I also figured that learning about myself will mean learning about them. The puzzle makes me want to fling myself out of the astronomy tower on most days but I… Listen, I thought about it.’ he added quickly when Sirius started drawing back._

_‘Clearly. I told James it was a bad idea to let you brood all on your own. Nothing good ever comes out from you brooding. Me, I used up my precious time to come up with our next prank, which is what I came to let you in on by the way. But you, no. You were just plotting about the first chance you’d get to howl at the moon with a pack of angry werewolves.’ declares Sirius, sitting back and crossing his arms over his chest, pouting._

_Remus chuckles softly and Sirius glares. ‘What is so funny?’ he asked petulantly._

_‘You.’ Remus ruffled his own hair and sighed, ‘Only you would be jealous of a pack of bloody mad wolves. I want to find out what I don’t know. I also suspect that no other werewolves already have a pack of illegal animagi friends devoted and brave enough to turn with them on the full moon. To keep them from wrecking chaos and murder. Who help them not hating themselves or … or from enjoying murder! It’s because of you, Prongs and Wormtail that I want to meet other wolves, Padfoot. You showed me what it meant to have people that care enough to ask questions about my transformation. To want to lessen my pain. Without you.. I’d still be in the Shrieking Shack hurting myself every months.. Without you I wouldn’t be looking up unicorns and werewolves. I’d just be hating myself.’ Sirius stopped glaring halfway through, giving Remus the courage to continue._

_‘Just like Dumbledore took the time to make sure that I could get an education. I want to talk to the other wolves and hear their stories and maybe even ask them about their experiences and how they deal with the pain. Enough stories will probably help future wolves and we could help each other. I’m not yet confident that the wizard community will like us or help us but what if I could write a new book for everyone anyway and maybe the next kid like me doing research doesn’t have to feel so lonely, lost or frustrated. I’m pretty sure that kid won’t have a Sirius Black to kick his ass when he is too moody. I feel like it’s my responsibility to him or her.’_

_‘You just want to write a book, you big nerd. I should have known.’ TeasedSirius. He wished that Remus knew how much he hated the idea of him having another pack or meeting another werewolf at all. But Sirius was clearly aware that it was misplaced protectiveness and him being selfish._

_Remus smiled fondly. ‘Books. A whole section of books.’ he said._

_‘Fine. That’s grand. And I know, Moony. It’s not fair. None of it is. I wish there’s more any of us could do to help you. Don’t think that I don’t know how brave and patient you are day in and day out. It’s your resilience that motivated us to become Animagi. It wasn’t pity or just so we could do something cool after curfew. I..’_

_‘I know all that, Padfoot. I know.’ Interrupted Remus._

_Did he though? Wondered Sirius. He surprised them both by yanking at Remus’ shirt to shove him forward so that they were nose to nose._

_‘Then know this: We’re too deep in it now and there’s no way the Marauders won’t help you when and where they can. You still won’t have to do it alone and if I see that you don’t ever ask for help once we’re out, I’ll bloody drag you back to the Shrieking Shack myself.’_

_From this close, Sirius could see Remus’ vivid green eyes alert with some emotion. They were really close, he thought as Remus’ hand grabbed his wrist and warm fingers enveloped it delicately. This, Sirius jolted privately, was exactly what he needed when he was in the same room as Remus. And when he wasn’t. Sirius wasn’t one to lie to himself for too long. Delay the inevitable or choose to ignore something that bothered him or unsettled him, yes. But to deceive himself, no. Half the time he was looking for Remus, he hoped for them to be in their own bubble where intimacy, friendship and authenticity were their only concerns. And he was well aware of that even if he wasn’t ready to deal with what it meant._

_‘Anything you want, Padfoot.’ Remus had smiled at him._

_‘Good’ stated Sirius as he reluctantly drew back. He made sure to stay within reach so that Remus could keep on holding his wrist. They were not holding hands, he reassured himself not knowing why. But they could keep touching. Ground each other without the need for more words._

_‘Here’s the plan of action. We can’t risk waiting for the next full moon. So we will go back to the woods to check our immediate surroundings and make sure the unicorn is not nearby.’ He finished and Remus nodded._

_‘But right now, you will accept this quiet night of not worrying about everything and everyone and oh joy, do more research.’ Added Sirius, satisfied._

_‘For the prank?’ Offered Remus, eyes dancing._

_‘Exactly. Besides - you’ll love this - we have a deadline so you might even have to stay up late for the rest of the week. Isn’t it your nerdy librarian kink? Am I not the best of friends to ever gracefully walk this earth?’ Teased Sirius._

_‘How lucky’ mocked Remus. ‘So what are we doing? When are we doing it?’_

_‘I thought you’d never ask!’ Said Sirius as he stood up. ‘Let’s talk about this on our way back. We don’t want Pince to overhear, do we?’_

* * *

* * *

**Friday evening**

**Marauders Dorm**

Avoiding the book flying over his head by an inch, Sirius reaches for his wand. A wolf, a hunt, a unicorn and the only thing that rubs James up the wrong way is Lily Evans. Go figure, Sirius broods. Sirius levitates everything he has close by and attacks James back. James starts grinning and reaches for his own wand. Sirius can see Peter scramble for his own out of fear to become collateral damage or because he wants to help James. 

It’s on. At least you can always count on James to be in for a bit of a brawl. Lily or not Lily, he is a Marauder first. Hiding behind his own bed, Sirius crawls toward its foot and glances at Peter and Remus. Peter is enthusiastically levitating everything that didn’t touch James, prepares to attack, one of his pillows in his other hand, acting as a shield. Remus on the other hand is laughing. He’s sitting cross legged in the middle of his bed, hand on one of his pillows, wand hand pretending to be relaxed. The other boy catches Sirius’ eyes and grins. That, Sirius solemnly approves, is what Remus should always be doing. Especially after such a week.

After a good deal of shouting and throwing things around, the room is in a chaotic state. Levitated objects scattering floor, beds and other furniture. Peter is chanting victory while, out of breath, Sirius is being pinned down by a very spirited James. 

‘Get off!’, he says, muffled by James' torso. ‘I will die of suffocation’.

‘You’d deserve it.’ claims James, also out of breath. ‘I will release you only if you repeat after me: I, Sirius Black, will solemnly swear to never ever, ever, show any form of contempt toward my best mate’s love life again. Or vilify Lily Evans again, for she is wonderful and of extreme beauty.’ 

‘NEVER!’ screams Sirius, ‘Moony help!’ 

‘I don’t want to be next. James hasn’t showered yet and I’d rather not have to use an antibacterial charm either’ says Remus, voice laughing somewhere Sirius can’t see. 

‘Just say it, Padfoot. It’s almost dinner time’, adds Peter, letting him know where his priorities lie.

‘That’s unfair. I have no real friends. I’m the only voice of reason here. Alright, I’ve had enough. Everyone will show me the respect I am owed.’

Sirius manages to get mobility in his arm again and uses it not to grab his wand but to tickle James. His best friend yelps and flails then trashes when Sirius gets his other hand in on the action. They are laughing and kicking until they can’t breathe. James retracts quickly up on the nearest bed trying to find his glasses amongst the mess while Sirius stands up and strolls to Remus’ bed - mostly undamaged -, where the boy is eyeing him warily. Sirius levitates away the books near Remus’ legs and feet and lies down next to him, one of Remus’ legs gets stuck under his own belly. 

‘We should be going over the plan and prank and not fighting over Evans. We got away with detention only and saved a life. Can we now focus on Marauder's duties?’

‘It means Sirius and I have one less hour to get prepared on Saturday.’ acknowledges James. 

‘It should be fine’ says Remus, stretching, ‘We have the spell. We probably need to train a little bit more for a bigger scale result though. I’m positive we can perfect it but we won’t have that much time to do it.’

‘What about our way in? Are we sure it’ll be empty.’ asks Peter. 

‘We’ll check the map. But I’m fairly certain everyone will be at the game. Although shouldn’t you two at least be there too?’ asks Remus looking at James and wiggling the leg currently trapped under Sirius' belly.

‘We will. At some point anyway. If we run out of time, you and Peter will have to carry on without us. Not that we need an alibi but you’re right, it’ll look suspicious for the Gryffindor team captain to not be there even if we’re not playing.’ acknowledges Sirius from his spot on the bed.

‘I’ve arranged for some of the first years to take notes of everything while I’m not there. And bribed them to not say a word about it.’ says James with satisfaction.

‘They worship the ground you walk on, of course they’ll do it. And that’s their shot at making the team next year.’ adds Sirius. ‘Ravenclaw is having a good year but Slytherin really wants to face us. They’ll fight bloody.’ 

‘When do they not?’ scoffs James. ‘No matter the results, we’ll have something for them to celebrate now!’ he adds with delight and a machiavellian smirk as he settles down on his own bed. 

‘We’re just that generous.’ confirms Sirius just as Remus snorts. 

Sirius looks up at Remus who already picked up a book again. A wave of affection ripples through Sirius as it usually happens when he looks at him. Remus who walks through life like he wants to hide, using books and papers as shields and excuses. Pretending for the rest of the world that he isn’t paying attention or that it doesn’t concern him. Sirius and the rest of the Marauders know just how untrue it is. Everyone would just assume the Marauders to be behind the prank anyway and they’ll all accept the masterminds to be James and himself. Peter too, even if they’d imagine him to do it just because of James or because he wouldn’t have known how to say no. They would be partially right here. Peter usually doesn’t do anything unless James is involved. But as time went by, he’d become a true marauder too, occasionally coming up with prank ideas himself, even if it was motivated by the need to impress his best friend. Sirius stopped judging him for that a long time ago. After all, he and James were coming up with better, stronger and more complicated ideas as a competition. They might consider each other more equals in designing evil schemes but they clearly both needed to impress each other. What no one actually understands or even imagines is that James and Sirius might almost always create occasions and motivation, they might even almost always get up to the most absurd plans and ideas but they both knew that their most dangerous tool of mayhem and general chaos was Remus. 

Because what Remus lacks in ideas or incentives, he makes up for in vision and manifestation. Remus Lupin in prank mode is a force of wickedness. And Remus doesn’t need recognition. He doesn’t compete with James and Sirius. He competes with himself. On prank business, nothing is impossible in Remus’ books. When James and Sirius wanted to confound Snape’s owl for a week during their second year, Remus was the one who not only got them to perfect the spell but also the one who said “A pity really to limit ourselves to one simple owl, isn’t it’ And that’s how all the school’s owls had been confounded for a week, causing all their mail to be mis-delivered, remembers Sirius fondly. Last year, it was Remus, who usually had no idea what happened during the Quidditch games, that decided to show his support for Sirius making the team as beater and James as captain and dyed everyone’s hair Gryffindor red, even the teachers’. Clogging every toilet in the school? Sirius had come up with the plan, James had masterminded the action but Remus had manufactured the best soap expansion spell with enthusiasm and precision. Once again, he would be a vital element of the prank thinks Sirius. They’d become legends one day and that wouldn’t be possible without Remus. 

‘What else do we need?’ asks Sirius, hand pulling down the book that partially hides Remus from him. 

Remus raises an eyebrow before answering ‘Other than the newest password to get in? We’re covered.’ 

Peter sits down near them and says ‘I’ll go get it while you’ll be in detention’. Using Peter’s animagus is a much welcomed addition to their necessary skills. Padfoot and Prongs are useless within the castle. 

‘Excellent. We’ll use the cloak and the map to go about undetected while everyone goes to leave the castle. We’ll be short on time so we will need to be really sneaky about it.’ says Sirius.

‘Yes, because discretion and sneaking around really were your forte this week’ admonishes Peter. 

Sirius throws him a dirty glare but has to concede that the boy is right. He really wanted to help Remus on this one… and yes alright, he also wanted to go into the forest at night even without the excuse of the full moon, sure. Everything he did was motivated by a selfless act of bravery, he convinced himself. Wasn’t he a Gryffindor through and through? How could he have foretold that the unicorn would show itself willingly and foolishly as if it wasn’t in great danger of being eaten (maybe) or hunted. As if Remus, or more precisely, as if the wolf inside of Remus couldn’t have smelled it. Baby unicorns are really really dumb. The books should have told them that. Looking back at Remus raising an amused brow at him, Sirius’ mind wanders back to the previous night. Remus wasn’t as amused then. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't find the internet post where I got inspired with the ideas for the pranks anymore sadly but the ideas are not from me.


	4. Hunting expedition

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last flashback through Sirius POV. What else is in the woods ?

**Thursday evening**

**Marauders Dorm**

_Sirius was calmly finishing his Arithmancy homework when the door of the bathroom opened in a great bang making the nearby furniture shake. Sirius almost jumped out his skin and stared at a berserk looking Remus. Eyes wide with madness and anger, hand still on the door, stuck in the doorway wearing only half buttoned pants and wet. Completely soaked as if he didn’t take the time to dry himself as he came out of the shower and barely remembered he should probably be wearing pants at all._

_‘What has gotten into you? Are you going bonkers?’ Yelled Sirius._

_‘I can smell it!’ bit Remus, looking more and more wacky. ‘I can smell it. Can’t you!? It’s not very strong but it’s here, Sirius. Somewhere here. I almost drowned myself in the shower to stop smelling it but it didn’t work!’_

_Sirius watched unmoving as Remus came forward in great strides and went toward the window, only half stopping to grab his pants with one hand as they were about to come down his legs and reveal fine bonny hips and no, Sirius did not just think that but yes he did._

_‘What?’ Croaked Sirius casting his eyes away from Remus’ hips to his lean and covered with droplets back - oh Merlin what - to the wavy mess of hair dripping water everywhere. They live together for Salazar’s sake! He has seen Remus in different states of undressed for years. What was happening to him?_

_‘I can smell it!’ Remus repeated unaware of what states he was putting Sirius in, the bastard. ‘The unicorn!’ he said as he opened the windows and almost threw himself out of it._

_‘You… what? It’s here? In the castle?’ Asked Sirius as he jumped on his feet and joined his friend at the window._

_Remus was bending forward so much his own feet were almost high above the floor. ‘No, but near. Very close. So, so close. I think I’d be able to know where in the castle if it had been inside. Bloody hell. It’s like it wants me to … to,’_

_‘Remus, calm down. You’ll fall down. Jumping out of the window isn’t going to solve this.’ Sirius said calmly as he reached for his friend’s shoulders and firmly brought him back inside the room, feet planted on the ground. He was very calm about it too. Not even disturbed by how he was touching Remus’ naked shoulder._

_‘Look at me!’, Remus’ head snapped away from the window and what was possibly happening outside. ‘You can smell the unicorn. Are you sure it’s the unicorn?’_

_‘_ ** _Yes_ ** _. It’s the same maddening smell, Sirius. I don’t need to be the wolf to know it. Maybe you can smell it too?’ he added reaching out for Sirius’ biceps. Oh boy, thought Sirius. Touching usually helped them to ground each other, so he knew that was why Remus was doing it. It was normal for them. They didn’t actually think about it or what it implied, though perhaps they should. But he was very annoyed that it had the opposite effect for himself right now._

_‘I don’t smell anything’ he said, ignoring the fact that it was because he was only smelling whatever Remus had been using as a shampoo or Remus himself. ‘I could turn into Padfoot.’_

_And so he did. The dog went at the window to sniff the air for whatever scent the unicorn was leaving behind. It took him a minute but he could swear that he was sniffing a fabulously fresh and earthy fragrance. He almost barked at the scent but it was faint enough that it din’t overwhelm him. Unlike Remus, nervously asking him over and over again if he was smelling anything. Sirius transformed back and Remus was right there again, all over him, shaking him - and his pants were falling down his hips again, please Merlin why - so Sirius pushed Remus’ arms away and grabbed his face with both hands._

_‘Stop shaking me! Yes, yes I smelled it, it’s nearby. Probably the edge of the forest. Now let’s calm down. Let’s take a deep breath and Moony for the love of Merlin, you are losing your bloody pants!’ - and you aren’t wearing any underwear - he almost added, frantically._

_Remus' eyes started to focus back onto reality and something on Sirius’ face must have snapped him back to it because he nodded, took a deep breath and grabbed his pants. Sirius approved with a deep long relieved sigh and hands still cupping Remus’ face, he added:_

_‘Now, it’s ok. Really it is. At least we won’t have to go too far to find it. It’ll be alright. You with me, Moony?’ he added because Remus hadn't said a thing in almost one minute._

_Which was a long time when your face was being held firmly between someone else’s hands. ‘Yeah, yes I am. Sorry. I… I have no idea what is happening.’_

_‘Bollocks and here we thought you’d be able to let us in on it.’ Said James’ voice from the room’s doorway._

_Sirius and Remus both moved their heads toward the door to see James squinting at them, a very puzzled Peter behind him._

_It occurred to Sirius that he and Remus were still very close, he still had his face in his hands and Remus was still not wearing enough items of clothing. They both looked back at each other and Sirius freed him, stepping back. Remus nodded and finally used his brain cells to button his own pants. Sirius took it, that it was his cue to bring the rest of the Marauders up to speed._

_‘Remus and I can smell the unicorn. It’s not in the castle but it’s very close. I turned into Padfoot and it’s here. So shall we go and find it now?’_

_‘Why would it even come close to human constructions?’ Asked James as if anyone cared._

_‘Who cares. It’s here and we’re getting rid of it.’ Answered a very exasperated Sirius._

_‘How? What are we going to do with it?’ finally spoke Remus as he was trying to find more ways to cover himself. Good, good. Brilliant thinking process here, finally._

_‘I don’t know. Get it deeper into the forest? We’ll figure it out once we’ve found it. Before it goes too far and we have to disappear for a hunt for too long.’ Rushed Sirius, more than ready to take any sort of action._

_He looked at James for a second. Behind his glasses, James nodded as if to say, he was listening and once again Sirius blessed how he and James were able to communicate without words as if they were of the same mind. So Sirius looked furtively at Remus before staring into James’ eyes again. James frowned then sighed. Good, someone else was using his brain to remember important conversations that were held. Tentatively James cleared his throat._

_‘Wormtail, Padfoot and I will go and look for it. You can stay here, Moony.’_

_‘What!?’ he said affronted and looked at Sirius for confirmation. When he saw that Sirius said nothing more, he looked back at James. ‘You’ve already decided. You were going to go back without me already, weren’t you? I can help. This is my problem.’_

_‘This is our problem and always has been. We’re the reason you were in the forest in the first place, Moony. And you bloody well know you won’t be able to keep up with us once we’ve turned.’ Berated James. Sirius was glad that for once he was not on the receiving hand of James Potter’s righteous and accusatory glare. There was nothing Remus could add to that but he tried, bless him._

_‘What am I supposed to do in the meantime? How do I even know that you are safe? I am not going to stay here clueless all night!’ Remus looked like he’s two seconds away from jumping out of the window again, before anyone had the time to explain how illogical he was being._

_‘No,’ interrupted Sirius, ‘We can keep a means of communication’. Going for his bed, Sirius shared another look with James who was crossing the room to take off his robes. Peter did the same looking nervously toward Remus. After a few seconds Sirius found the mirror he kept in his bag or pockets at all times. He strode back to Remus and put it in his hands. Remus stared at it clueless and impatient._

_‘It’s a Two-way mirror. Prongs and I use it all the time, he has the other one of the pair. Just say James’ name into it and you’ll appear in this one. We’ll be able to talk.’ Remus opened the mirror and nodded before closing it again._

_‘I’m sorry you can’t come but this one is on us, Moony.’_

_‘You’re always putting yourselves in danger for me. I just..’ he started tormented._

_‘That’s what friends do, don’t they?’ Asked Sirius. ‘Wouldn’t you do exactly the same for us?’_

_‘Yes. Yes I would.’ Asserted Remus, suddenly emotional. Maybe they shouldn’t leave him alone after all. James came to stand by them and put a hand on Remus, holding his gaze before saying with a half smile:_

_‘And besides, this time we’re saving a unicorn’s life instead of risking our own lives for Snivellus. We’ll be fine, Moony. It’s only a unicorn and the big bad wolf isn’t even going to be around.’_

_‘We’ll just scare it away from the forest. Might even get a bit of its mane or tail hair while we’re at it, you know? I hear it’s really expensive. We might yet make a fortune out of it. What do you think James? Fancy a new broom?’ Tossed Sirius smirking._

_‘Mmmh. What about acquiring more dungbombs?’ Asked James._

_‘Ah yes, you can never have too many dungbombs.’ Agreed Sirius._

_He was only half joking now, minds drifting to the many many Slytherins who had yet to spend a few hours smelling like a troll just farted on them. He looked up at Remus who was not agreeing with that statement - because he was too busy tormenting himself about this all or because his prefect-ish moral goodness was killing all the fun out of him these days, who knew? - nervously holding the mirror as it might hold the solution to him not having to stay behind._

_‘No dungbombs then, Moony? I promise we’ll save enough money to get you a new book. Maybe that muggle book about the vampire Count, what do you say?’_

_Remus looked back at him and rolled his eyes which is exactly what Sirius was trying to achieve. Note to self: when dealing with wary and anxious teenage werewolves, do try to start a conversation about books to stir them away from misery. Most likely to remain a useful tactic in their adulthood._

_‘Let’s hold a vote when we come back.’ Said James. He stepped back and nodded as Peter moved to the door. ‘We’ll take the cloak. Remus you can keep the map. Peter, did you get the berries?’_

_‘I have them.’ announced Peter, a small brownish tainted bag suddenly in his hands._

_Remus nodded again silently as James and Peter went to the door, grabbing the cloak. Sirius was about to follow when Remus’ hands shot up and grabbed his arm:_

_‘Don’t do anything foolish, please.’_

_They found themselves there again. In the not so clear borders of friendship that’s not just friendship. Sirius grabbed Remus shirt and hold on for just a second before saying:_

_‘If I make any promises, it’ll just jinx it.’ And left the room._

* * *

_And so that’s how three Marauders had been walking quietly through the dark corridors of the castle toward the Forbidden Forest. Adrenaline only kicked in when they reached Hagrid’s cabin as Peter - who had already turned and was perched on James’ shoulder so they could all fit under the invisible cloak - started squeaking which confirmed that he got the unicorn scent. They removed the cloak once they were hidden by the trees, deep enough to walk freely and James used his mirror to tell Remus that they were ready to hunt. Sirius had already turned into Padfoot when James was done, excited at the prospect of racing freely in his Animagus form. The stag followed as the rat bolted toward the unicorn. But soon the dog caught it too and much like last time, he lost himself to the scent again. He wanted to hunt and play. To chase and bark. His heart was beating to a frantic joyful rhythm as he looked around and saw the stag following him steadily. It took Padfoot a moment to realise he was actually looking for the wolf too. Something pulled at his heart when he remembered why he wasn’t with the pack. With him._

_The stag and the rat both stopped. Padfoot jumped to their side, alert and eager. He almost barked but the stag turned back into James._

_‘Can you see it?’ he whispered._

_Padfoot stepped ahead, trailing the overpowering scent, getting slow and low. He was still as excited but he wanted to please his friend first. Until he saw it. The unicorn had heard them this time around and was looking warily at the dog, ears forward and attentive. It was retracting slowly, sterling silver mane looking almost metallic. Padfoot stopped and sat stills with only its tail flapping as James walked from behind a tree, Wormtail on his shoulder. Padfoot wanted to play around though and to chase again. He wanted to roll around and growl and pounce. Get closer to the scent. Later Sirius will realise that this time around he hadn’t once wanted to attack or bite the unicorn, as if without the wolf nearby he didn’t seem to want to act as a predator and he vouched never to mention this to Remus._

_‘Alright mate, let’s do this smartly. No sudden movement. No one wants to harm you. All we want is for you to go far far away. This isn't safe.’ Said James, wand ready and fixing the unicorn. It didn’t make a sound when it moved but Padfoot saw it anyway. Was James actually trying to reason with something that could not understand him? The unicorn took a small step sideway before it darted on their right, fast and swift._

_‘Bollocks!’ Cursed James. ‘Let’s go, it’s going back toward the edge of the forest!’ he added before changing back, Wormtail jumping away from him just in time. Prongs chased after the mythical creature with determination as Padfoot raced ahead._

_It felt pretty ecstatic for a while and Padfoot was the happiest dog to ever chase and roll and growl. But it became less funny when he realised that the unicorn was leading them toward the very border of the forest. He could smell Hagrid’s hut. Padfoot barked once and the stag halted. They looked at each other. The dog raced ahead and Prongs followed, understanding that he was not taking the lead here anymore. After a few minutes, they found themselves exactly near the last line of trees separating the forest from the plains. From the outskirts of the castle. The unicorn slowed. and frantically searched for a way to go backward, undoubtedly realising it was about to leave the forest. Padfoot reacted pretty quickly and started growling low, scaring it into immobility. It padded backward until it was just out of the forest for the rest of the world to see and Padfoot felt some kind of dread. He prayed that Remus hadn’t followed, that Hagrid was nowhere around. He was really happy it was not a full moon even if it was still giving enough light that could shine that silver mane and catch someone’s attention. Like a beacon. The stag came forward too, steadily and it locked eyes with the frightened animal. Padfoot growled once more and Prongs transformed back into James again. This time, his mate didn’t wait to talk with the unicorn, thank Merlin._

_‘Carpe Retractum!’ Yelled James, and a rope of light came out of his wand to close around the horse shaped creature’s long neck._

_‘Good lord, yes yes!’ he said with satisfaction before the unicorn went backward trashing to get free. ‘What no no! wait, argh..’ Fought James as he was pulled toward it. ‘I’m supposed to be pulling you back in, you dumb beast! Son of a Bludger, a little help here!’ he screamed getting dragged and falling butt first on the ground._

_Padfoot growled again and the unicorn stopped for a second. Enough for Sirius to transform into himself again. Wand at the ready, he laughed at James. ‘Why didn’t you use Immobolus first?’_

_‘I… don't.. know. Sirius! Come here and do something!’ he ordered out of breath and somewhat at his limits._

_‘Alright, alright. Hold your hippogriffs, mate! Or you know, your unicorn!’ Sirius joked, proud with himself. ‘Carpe Retractum!’ A second rope came out and tangled around the unicorn’s neck and together - now that James was back up again - and they started pulling, helped by the charm’s magical strength and James’ best attempt at soothing it. ‘Peter! Might be a good time to help and feed the beast with some sweets!’_

_‘Sorry’ said Wormtail as he turned back into Peter on their left and produced a bag of berries, apparently a favourite of the magical creature._

_They were far enough from the edge of the forest to stop pulling it in with too much force._

_‘Come on, Peter.' Encouraged James. The unicorn stomped and moved its head to try and untangle the ropes. Peter came forward, hands up and berries in his palm._

_‘It’ll be alright now. We’ve had a good run, right? How about some berries now. Come on.. come on’ said Peter soothingly. The unicorn stomped back a few times, eyeing Peter, Sirius and James warily but ended up smelling Peter’s palm. It took a few tensed minutes of occasional grunts covered by Peter’s calming words. Until at last, the unicorn gave one last sniff to the berries and opened its mouth to eat them. Peter gave a little cry of satisfaction and James sighed, relieved._

_Peter started to back away, luring it with more berries and slowly they went deeper in the forest. But not fast enough now that they were in their human forms, thought Sirius._

_‘What are we going to do about it? If we transform back, is it going to follow us?’ he asked._

_‘I don’t know. Let’s remove one of the ropes first. Show that we are indeed trustworthy.’ Proposed James. Sirius nodded and James ended his spell. If the unicorn felt any change, it didn’t show it._

_‘I’m almost out of berries.’ Announced Peter after enough time had passed where no new idea had been found._

_They all looked at each other, now pretty sorry that they didn’t come up with a much better plan before leaving. Even Sirius had to admit that walking around with a unicorn in their human forms didn't feel as exciting and thrilling. Every sound the forest was making felt scarier and gloomier. Every tree could hide a dangerous creature. Besides, they didn’t have a wolf with them to be the most dangerous beast around. When Peter ran out of berries though, the unicorn still let itself be led somewhere they themselves didn’t know._

_‘I think it likes me now’ said Peter as he tentatively scratched the unicorn between the eyes. The unicorn responded well to it and followed his hand when it tried to go away. Peter was delighted of course and Sirius saw James half smiling at the scene. He didn’t know how long they had been walking when they finally stopped near a clearing and the unicorn went to drink some water._

_‘Well, we’re lucky Remus isn’t here. He would be impossible right now and reprimand us for our lack of preparation. And solutions. What are we going to do now? I really don’t want to go back to the castle with this thing and have Remus chant ‘I told you so’ to us.’_

_‘It’s Remus. He wouldn’t do that.’ Said James cleaning his glasses and passing a hand through his disheveled hair. ‘He’d just sit and look at us all with a superior but quiet air of disapproval. And then drag us to the library.’_

_‘James, I don’t want to be dragged to the library.’ he swallowed pitifully. Sirius Black didn’t go to the library. ‘I also don’t want Moony to keep worrying about killing a unicorn. I know it’s eating at him.’ he confessed._

_‘I know, Padfoot.’ Said James hands crossed on his chest as he was looking at Peter caressing the unicorn’s mane. ‘But we can’t just vanish it somewhere we don’t know. It wouldn’t be saving it. And none of us can apparate yet.’ he looked back at Sirius, ‘We could send Remus to the library now to figure out a transportation spell. A safe one, that is. He wouldn’t be angry or self righteous for long. He’d be too busy trying to do his part.’_

_‘He doesn’t have the cloak. It’s too dangerous. What if we commend it to go somewhere specific. There must be a spell for that no?’ he thought._

_‘There’s something about manipulating or using forceful magic on a unicorn that doesn’t sit well with me though.’ Said James guiltily. ‘It’s why I didn’t want to use Immobulus on it.’_

_‘That’s very kind and swell, mate. But it doesn’t really leave us with much more options. Look, we just --’ He started before he could hear a nearby sound of trees and branches being moved by something other than the wind. ‘What is that?’_

_‘I don’t --. Peter! Wand out! Try to keep it calm!’ Ordered James, his own wand at the ready as they could now hear sounds of heavy footsteps thundering closer and closer. Sirius still had the rope so James moved forward to stand in front of him, in a defensive and protective stance._

_A few seconds later, two massive figures stepped away from the nearest trees and showed themselves to the three friends. The unicorn made a small distress sound and Sirius almost let it throw him backward as he was taking stock of what he was seeing. Two half men, half horses individuals stopped. They had wide torsos and wide waists, long hairs and one of them even had a sort of beard. Centaurs. That was who just appeared in front of them. The one in front was all white and the one behind, squinting at them with a bow in his hands, was black. He looked more severe than his companion. Sirius’ mind was in overdrive, trying to think of a way to run away with the unicorn or to decide what to say to the centaurs. James was gaping for a moment before he gained back control and tried to look confident, his wand pointed toward them while Peter was hiding behind the unicorn._

_Sirius focused his attention on the white centaur who - he thought - was looking at them more puzzled than hostile._

_‘What is the meaning of all this? Who are you?’ he asked, a cool and sardonic voice that couldn’t be mistaken for anything other than an order. The shock of being addressed by an actual centaur kept them from answering right away but eventually James tried._

_‘Uh.. We.. We are.. uh’ started James._

_‘Isn’t it obvious? They come from the school.’ Said the centaur at the back who had now come forward and was the centaur on the right. ‘What are the students of Hogwarts doing to a unicorn? In the forest at night?’ he asked in a deep accusing voice._

_James was struck to silence again and neither Sirius nor Peter seemed inclined to speak at all._

_‘Well? Speak up at once!’ Ordered the black centaur, bringing his bow higher as if to shoot an arrow at them._

_‘Saving it!’ Rushed Sirius without thinking. ‘We are trying to save it. It came wandering near the castle and we.. we saw it so we decided to bring it back to the forest.’_

_‘Saving the unicorn? As if it needs wizard protection.’ Answered the same dark voice._

_‘My friend is telling the truth. We brought it back that far. Only we don’t really know what to do with it now. It.. is following us almost willingly. We just --’ explained James before being cut off by the centaur._

_‘If it is willing to follow you, then why are you restraining it?’ His tone indicated to a rather frightened Sirius that he was not believing them and that reasoning with it surely was pointless._

_‘Well it took us a while to catch it and it kept going back toward the castle.’ Explained James in a new attempt to tell them the truth. ‘Listen, We understand that it probably makes no sense but we swear we don’t want to harm anyone. And actually, we wouldn’t mind a little bit of help. As I mentioned, we don’t exactly know where it is coming from and why it strayed so far away from where it used to be.’_

_Sirius was very very happy James is doing the talking. Up until the centaur on the left asked:_

_‘Isn’t it deep enough in the forest to be safe?’_

_And James answered: ‘No. I mean yes yes, but not quite. You see there’s.. there might be something dangerous around the castle. Dangerous for the unicorn, I mean.’_

_‘Prongs!’ Hissed Sirius. James’ shoulder squared up but he didn’t look at Sirius. Was he mad!? James could not actually be telling the centaurs about Remus!_

_‘Dangerous?’ Asked the same centaur, unconvinced. ‘What creatures do you hide behind your walls? For there are very few things more powerful than unicorns.’_

_‘Well,’ started James but Sirius cut him off._

_‘We don’t actually know if it is dangerous. This is more of a preventive operation, really.’ he tried. ‘Look, take it. Take the unicorn and protect it.’_

_‘From a creature that may not prove to be dangerous?’ Asked the centaur, dubious._

_‘Yes. Better safe than sorry. Truly. We do not want it here or near the castle. We want it as far away from here as possible. You two seem capable and all knowing. Or at least knowing much more than us, delusional kids who thought to go on an adventure to save a mythical creature. You’d be doing us a favour.’ he said almost without breathing._

_‘Centaurs do not grant favours to trivial humans!’ Snarled the dark centaur._

_Sirius took a step back, ‘Yes of course. I mean yes yes, we are… trivial puny humans. We never meant,.. I never meant…’. This was going great, he thought._

_‘Padfoot, I think you should stop talking now!’ Muttered James._

_‘Su...sure. Sorry.’ Mumbled Sirius as the centaur moved forward, bow ready to attack._

_They would die tonight thought Sirius. The big centaur would throw an arrow at each of them just on the fact that they existed and were humans. At least it would sound cool. Being killed off by a giant half man, half horse and murdered by an arrow in a forbidden forest was pretty cool, right? It would solve all his parents' issues and they would have no regrets having disowned him and putting all their hopes onto Regulus. He was really upset about that. He had hoped to be a thorn in their lives for a lot longer than that. He knew it was always a possibility to die young when you go on impossible adventures that involve being an illegal Animagus and had a werewolf best friend but he still had hoped to stay alive long enough to pass his N.E.W.T._

_Remus! Oh Remus, lamented Sirius. What was going to happen to Remus when all his friends' bodies would be found mutilated with arrows? He would feel so guilty and go kill himself by getting a big library shelf full of encyclopedias and all the forbidden sections to fall on himself. Death by books, as Sirius has always predicted. The thought of Remus being left alone to deal with the full moon, the despair of knowing he should have come with them to this; their last adventure, almost made him pray for a miracle. He felt kind of selfish now that he hadn’t insist on Remus to join them as they were hurling themselves head first into their own doom. Poor Remus, he deplored._

_‘Remus?’ Said James’ voice all of the sudden as if they were not seconds away from being murdered by centaurs._

_‘James?’ Asked a muffled voice, almost imperceptible. ‘James, can you hear me?’, Yes, a muffled, worried and slightly higher than usual voice who actually seemed to be Remus’. Sirius’ heart started beating a staccato rhythm and he got a better grip on his wand._

_‘What is this?’ Asked the centaur, angrier by the seconds, ‘Who else is there?’_

_It finally dawned on James where the voice was coming from and he put his free hand in his pocket. Which turned out to be a mistake of epic proportion as it only gave the centaur the incentive to actually throw that arrow._

_Three things happen simultaneously: James jumped away, Peter and Sirius screamed ‘No!’ and ‘James’ and the white centaur stepped forward to place himself between them and his partner._

_‘Danix, Stop! No, we do not harm humans. Especially young ones!’ he admonished, hands in front of himself._

_‘They are liars and trying to manipulate us, Alandras. Do not be fooled.’ Shouted their attacker._

_‘It’s a mirror!’ Yelled Sirius as he looked at the scene and back at James on the ground staring at the arrow near his leg, face livid. ‘It’s a Two-way mirror so we can keep in contact with our friend. He is just worried for us!’_

_Slowly James took the mirror out of his pocket and showed it to the centaurs. The white one, Alandras gave a threatening glare to his friend before nodding at James. Encouraged, James opened it, hands trembling._

_‘Remus?’ he said with little assurance. He cleared his throat and tried again. ‘Remus, mate, can you hear me?’. Remus’ voice came clearer this time, frantic._

_‘James? Oh thank Merlin! What is happening? Are you alright? Did you find the unicorn? Is it safe? James?’_

_‘I.. We are alright’ offered James looking at the centaur and raising a brow as if to say, are we really? ‘Yes, we have found the unicorn. It has eaten all the berries and it is safe’. They all heard a relieved sigh. The centaurs still hadn’t moved but they were both looking at the mirror._

_‘Good! I was so worried. It’s just that you’ve been gone for a very long time. What are you going to do with the unicorn? You never said how you were going to hide it or protect it from the wolf?’_

_If Sirius still had been in dog form, he probably would have howled right now. Did he actually want every single mythical creature to ever walk on this earth to be the death of him?_

_Everyone but the unicorn tensed. Alandras stepped toward them._

_‘The wolf? Is this the dangerous creature who wants to kill the unicorn?’_

_‘Who’s that?’ Said Remus._

_‘We.. ugh.. we seem to have met a couple centaurs in our quest to return the unicorn somewhere safe. They don’t like us very much.’ Said James warily._

_‘Centaurs! WHAT?’ which Sirius, whose perhaps most important superpower in life was to understand the language of Remus and its hidden messages, immediately translated into ‘I BLOODY KNEW YOU LOT WERE MENTAL BUT I DIDN’T YET KNOW HOW BAD IT WAS’. And he didn’t even blame him._

_‘Yes. Would you like to talk to them and confirm that we do not want to hurt the unicorn?’ Asked James._

_Sirius glared daggers at him but James ignored him. Bad. Very very bad to let Remus say anything else._

_‘You did not answer my question, young one. Your friend mentioned a wolf.’ Said Alandras taking a step closer to James as Danix did the same, supposedly to be ready to attack at any sign of danger to his friend._

_‘Yes’ said the very determined voice of one very stupid Remus John Lupin. ‘During the full moon, there is a werewolf in this forest. Do not ask us how we know but we do. And my friends just wanted to help the unicorn get as far away from its usual … hunting ground before the next full moon.’_

_‘The unicorn is not very fast yet’ said James relieved to see that the centaurs were listening._

_‘It’s really trusting and eats berries’ finally said Peter, finding his voice again, arms around the unicorn’s neck, in a sort of protective grip._

_‘We don’t know what the wolf can do to it.’ Clarified Sirius. Or what it might do to the wolf and to Moony, really. But he kept that to himself. Moony on the other hand didn’t know when to shut up._

_‘Do you know?’ Remus asked, uncertain. ‘Do you know what would happen to the wolf if it killed the unicorn?’._

_The centaurs looked at each other, a bit at loss. Alandras turned to the wizards again and bent over to get closer to the mirror._

_‘What are you afraid of, young one?’ he asked, curious._

_‘Only that it will grow stronger and become even more of a monster. Maybe that his human self might die from it. From the blood, or .. or--’ confessed Remus, who clearly had zero self preservation._

_‘It’s unlikely that it will die from it. Not while it is this young. Young unicorns would not do much to either the wolf or its human self. And a werewolf wouldn’t catch an adult one.’ Declared Alandras and Remus sighed. Sirius was too stressed out right now to be relieved._

_‘Oh. Ok. That's good news, I guess.’ Supplied Remus._

_‘If there is indeed a werewolf about this part of the forest, let us have the unicorn, yes. We’ll make sure it won’t find itself back here and you can go back to your castle and your spells. This is a very dangerous place for humans. You should have let nature decide for itself.’_

_‘Alandras!’ Said Danix, who at some point stopped aiming its bow at them. ‘What are you doing?’_

_‘Making sure no one else ventures here. If they go missing, more humans will come. If the wolf kills the unicorn, we will be guilty of helping it by not protecting it now. I do not wish that. Let us be on our way now.’ Called Alandras, stepping closer to the unicorn._

_Peter stumbled back and almost fell into the water. James came back up and went to Sirius then placed his hand on his wand arm. Sirius whispered to kill the spell and the unicorn was free of the rope. It was looking intently into the centaur’s eye now. Danix eyed them with mistrust and started galloping back. Alandras whispered to the unicorn before starting back too, followed by the horse-like creature who blindly and happily followed it. Alandras turned to the three of them one last time before giving them a small head bow and galloped away._

_After what felt like an eternity where no one said anything, Sirius cleared his throat and said:_

_‘I bloody hate unicorns.’_

* * *

* * *

**Friday evening**

**Marauders Dorm**

This entire ordeal finally being behind them, Sirius could look forward to their week-end of mischief and revel in the fact that he had a focused and somewhat relaxed Remus for himself. As relaxing as pranking the entire Slytherin house could be, of course. He’s just really glad that Remus isn’t going to maybe kill or eat a unicorn. And now that he met two centaurs, he really hopes to never have to meet one again in his life. They haven’t talked about it much, he thinks because Remus had known that Sirius disapproved of his reckless need to ask the centaurs about werewolves and nobody wanted to fight about it last night. Then they had heard that someone had seen James and Sirius pulling the unicorn back into the forest during breakfast and worry had distracted Remus again. But now that it was over, Sirius vouched to do everything in his power to make Remus smile and feel at ease again. Just like now, reading a book before dinner, brow slightly furrowed and occasionally stroking Sirius’ elbow where it is in contact with his hand while he is pretending to doze off. And always when James or Peter are looking elsewhere. 


	5. It takes some words to make an action

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> James and Sirius have detention... and feelings.

**Saturday Morning**

**Prefects bathroom**

There’s only the sound of dripping water and Sirius’ furious mopping when James emerges from the nearest airing cupboard, new soap at hand and grimly determined to finish this within the hour. He has to hand it to Lily, she did find the most useless and annoying way for them to spend their detention. He is comforted a little by the fact that unlike Sirius who is never going to wash here and appreciate the results of all their hard work, he’ll be able to take a bath and appreciate how clean the bathroom is. Being a Quidditch captain truly has its benefits. Best not to remind it to Sirius though as Remus, being a Prefect, would also get to enjoy this.

It turns out to be surprisingly soothing as he and Sirius work for the most part in total silence and perform the same repetitive efforts. Mop, dry, scrub, clean, dry, mop again and polish. It surely helps him do some thinking. About their little encounter with the centaurs. About Lily. About the prank. Everything happened so fast this week, he’s almost relieved to see it end. He’s excited about the prank but exhausted nonetheless. Sirius seems to be following the same train of thoughts. 

‘She’s enjoying it a little too much, you know. Punishing us.’ says Sirius after dropping his mop and jumping down the marble made swimming pool-like tub. He starts to clean the taps surrounding it with energy. 

‘Probably. We’re giving her a lot of occasions though. We might want to slow down a bit. I’m trying to show her that I can be mature enough to be worthy of a date.” says James as he cleans the giant windows. He knows Sirius just rolled his eyes at him. 

‘At the risk of sounding redundant, do you really think it’s ever going to happen?’ Sirius asks.

‘Yes. I’m pretty sure I’m growing on her already.’ announces James. At least he hopes he’s not reading her too inaccurately. Merlin knows he has in the past.

‘Yes because nothing says ‘I think you are less of an idiot and I might actually like to talk to you’ better than to make you mop the Prefects’ bathroom the muggle’s way.’ says Sirius, drily. 

‘Actually given our history, this detention is pretty soft. Think about it. She didn’t go to McGonagall, she didn’t yell at me in front of everyone and I got the feeling that she was screaming out of habit and to keep up appearances rather than being really upset with me.’

‘So what? You went from upsetting her to somewhat annoying her and suddenly you picture the two of you holding hands and drinking tea at Madam Puddifoots’?’ Challenges Sirius. 

‘Why not?’ Answers James rolling his eyes at his friend for being a non believer of the great love story that he and Lily would someday be living. ‘Have a little faith in me, Pads. Have I not proven over and over again that I’m pretty good at getting what I want?’ he says with much more ego than he should be having. 

‘Sure. Except for this. It’s been years. You’ve made a fool of yourself enough for every girl at school to never want to be around you. Without being inebriated most of the time, which is sad. At least make sure to be able to blame it on the drink, you know!’ Accuses Sirius, even though none of them is legally allowed to drink yet. 

‘Right. I have faith in us for the rest of the world, it’s fine.’ smiles James, serein. 

And it’s true. He isn’t even annoyed by Sirius' skepticism, he’s so used to it by now and from the outside, he must admit that he looks short of a few marbles and fantastically foolish. But it’s Lily Evans. It was always Lily Evans. Or at least it has been since he’d seen her for the first time, walking up to the Sorting Hat, scared but determined. He had found her pretty first, of course. There was no denying that even back then he’d been a little awestruck at such improbably vivid red hair. She had the prettiest eyes he’d seen too. He starts thinking of all these adorable littles freckles that are covering her face and how often he’d found himself fascinated by how they’d almost disappear being her faint rosy to tell-tale crimson blush. He’d do anything to see them up close. He’d lost countless hours daydreaming about her during his first three years at Hogwarts until he’d finally decide that just making her aware of his existence through boyish clumsy teasing and letting her know he was behind all these pranks, wasn’t enough. He had always been good at school and prided himself in being top of the class whenever he could, without much work on his part but then it had become vital to show her how not stupid he was. A little competition with her meant that she was aware of him. 

But it was exactly this that sealed it for him. That she was incredibly smart and kind. That she outwitted himself or Sirius most of the time. Remus struggled a lot to keep up with her too. James was fascinated by her temper, even if he usually ended up suffering for it. She had character. Much like his own mother and he never missed how his father would be equally wary and jubilant when it came alive. Lily was mostly fair and loyal too. Sensitive and patient. 

And then there’s the way she makes him feel. One look from her is certain to liquify all his insides. He’d think that his organs were all in the wrong place. Anticipation and eagerness to have her look at him again made him foolish enough in the past. But the past year, he’d learned that patience and hope coupled with a few good actions like winning the House and Quidditch cups, joining her and Remus in their late library group studies and not saying a word or only offering his own skills to help everyone get better, had helped. She wasn’t only looking at him suspiciously anymore. She still didn’t approve of the pranks but that’s not something he was ready to give up. None of what he had done to make her see him and like him had been a lie. He had always shown a true version of himself. Just one she wasn’t so accustomed to he realises as he turns his back to Sirius.

‘And I’ll believe it when you guys are married and she’s having all your Potter babies.’ offers Sirius with indulgence. 

‘I’d settle for her kissing me and becoming my girlfriend but why not.’ He offers back. 

‘What do you think she’ll say about this prank?’ asks his friends still cleaning the taps. ‘We’re going pretty big with this one.’ 

And they are. However they aren’t harming anyone he thinks, reassuring himself. But Sirius’ question does rekindle something he is not quite sure how to bring up or if he actually wants to. Would Sirius understand? This is actually something that has him awake at night quite often these days. The double edge sword of Lily having to know all facets of him is that some of these facets, he feels uncomfortable with. He has to admit that for all his bravado about being one hundred percent honest, he has had to acknowledge that some of her prejudices against him might be more than true. He turns back biting his lower lip and fixes Sirius’ back as his friend is working. He hesitates. But if one person can answer him here it’s probably Sirius.

‘Do you think we’re going too far sometimes?’ He asks, unsure.

Sirius straightens and looks back at him, at loss.

‘I worry sometimes. About the pranks. About how … how it’s not just for fun anymore.’ reveals James. 

‘What do you mean ‘not just for fun anymore’? That’s all we ever wanted. To have a good laugh and outsmart everyone.’ His friend is clearly taken aback by the question. 

‘Is it just that though? I mean, it used to be that we’d prank everyone but now we mostly focus on the Slytherins.’ He pauses. ‘On Snape.’ he adds warily. 

Sirius comes closer and looks up at him from the pool-like tub. They share one of their long looks that is almost carrying an entire conversation where no words are needed. Then Sirius gives up, probably sensing that James wants to say something and just needs help to get it out.

‘What is it that you are really afraid of, James?’ Enquiries Sirius. ‘We’ve always tormented Snivellus. Why is it different now? If ever, it should have been our sole occupation. Is it because of what he said to Lily that day?’ 

Was it, wonders James? It was more than that. 

‘I.. Yes and no. She is not talking to him anymore, I’ve noticed. They are not partnering up in Potions anymore. Not since that day. Part of me feels really lousy about that.’ he confesses.

‘James, mate, what are you talking about?’ finally asks Sirius staring at him as if his prongs are growing on his head even though he hasn’t transformed. ‘How is it a bad thing? No one ever understood why she was friends with him in the first place. He’s awful to everyone but her. And she finally saw it. This is a good thing. A good thing in general but a very good thing for you also! Let’s not pretend that him hating you wasn’t a big thorn in your fairytale plot to win her over.’

Sirius is not wrong but then he is also missing the point entirely. It’s his own fault, he is indeed beating around the bush. 

‘I’m not feeling bad because they aren’t friends anymore. I feel guilty because it was our fault. I feel guilty for how it happened. I can’t quite feel good about the fact that I made her sad and … and Sirius, I feel awful about what we did to him that day.’ He wants to look away from Sirius when he says it but he needs his friend to understand. ‘It wasn’t right. She was right, we were bullies and-’

‘I know that!’ cuts Sirius now looking a lot uneasy. ‘And I… I guess you are right. We shouldn’t have done that but he deserved it. I know it looks like it came out of nowhere but it didn’t.’

‘Yes it did! I was bored and he was there and I was --’ starts James, not as ready to find excuses for his own actions anymore before Sirius stops him.

‘You were angry. You were … Snape had been taunting us for weeks, mate!’ Sirius starts pleading. ‘You know he had been. All these snarky comments about my parents and my family. Everything was awful. I was miserable and he… Regulus being friends with him and Snape using him to get at me. And what they started to do with all these Slytherins, whispering and insulting muggle born and whatnot. How he was around Remus!’ 

Sirius is angry now as he tries to climb out of the tub ungracefully. James extends his hand to pull him over the edge and once they are face to face, Sirius puts his hands on James shoulder trying to shake him as if to bring him back to reality. 

‘You know that right?’

James looks Sirius in the eyes and nods. Then he looks away and says:

‘You are not wrong. But you’re also way off.’ He breathes harshly before turning his face back to his best friend. ‘I should have… It’s not even about Lily. I know why I did it. It all seemed pretty logical when I went to him and used Levicorpus. I looked at him and I saw it all. How miserable you were after you were thrown away by your own family and him alienating Regulus even further from you. Him spewing curses and hexes on younger students all the while chanting about the pure bloods’ superiority and pretending to be good around Lily. He’d hide behind Mulciber until he would not even hide anymore. How he was already so close to Remus’ secret back then, attacking him and making fun of his scars. All of this is true, But you know what else is true? I liked it. I was being cruel for the sake of being cruel and I liked it. I enjoyed watching him being humiliated even though he had no means to defend himself. I only started to regret it when Lily showed up but then I was already too deep in it. How is that right, Sirius? Surely it doesn’t make me better than him.’ James closes his eyes, ashamed by his confession and angry at himself for feeling that way but unable to lie anymore.

Sirius is visibly shaken too and they both breath it out for a moment. Until Sirius tries to speak. 

‘Wow. That’s a lot of .. feelings, mate.’ 

‘I know. Listen, I’m just telling you. I … That’s not who I want to be. It scares the bloody hell out of me that it was how I felt in that moment.’ finishes James.

Sirius takes another deep breath and says: 

‘I get it. I’m not proud of it either. I could have stopped you but I only made it worse, didn’t I? And I know … I know I should feel more guilty about it. But I don’t. I just don’t.’ reveals Sirius. 

James takes a second to digest that piece of information before Sirius adds: 

‘The way I see it, it would have happened anyway. It’s bad that you were the one to go after him and not in response to him doing anything to any of us at that exact moment. But one of us would have crossed a line at some point. It was too intense. And I know you… You think that’s not a good enough excuse but listen to me.’ 

Sirius makes sure James is listening before he continues: ‘You are nothing like that vermin. You enjoyed tormenting way too much for a minute, fine. But you know what else is true? This.’ He says with a mix of fury and dedication. ‘You! Now agonising over it. Feeling guilty and wondering if you are a monster. Telling me that you don’t want to be that person.’ Sirius opens his arm as if to gather all the truth in the air and blow it at James. ‘Do you think Snape is doing that right now? Do you think he ever felt guilty for what he put us through before that and after that?’ Finishes Sirius, vehemently. 

James is moved, really he is. Sirius has always had an uncanny and quite explosive way to let you know exactly what he sees in you and James must admit that most of the time, he’s the compass that leads him in the right direction and the mirror that reflects his deepest thoughts. As bright or as dark as they might be. It’s a comfort he hopes never to have to live without. The question though demands real thoughts. Did Severus Snape ever feel guilty? 

‘He might feel guilty.’ says James. ‘We’ve never asked him.’ Not that he would admit it to them.

‘You’re only saying that because of Lily this time. I have no trouble picturing him saying so to Evans. He probably did and added extra chunky platitudes and excuses. But his actions in general speak volume too and eventually even Lily saw the truth. We might have pushed him to it but he went over the line on his own when he called her a mudblood. When he calls all the other ones mudbloods. What we did that day… The blame is shared but the shame isn’t, James. You are a thousand times the bloke Snape is or ever will be so I refuse to hear you be such a prat to yourself.’ 

James nods, immensely grateful for his friend. There’s still some contradictions plaguing him but he feels lighter. Sirius almost smiles but his brow suddenly darkens. 

‘Besides, whatever you did to him that day, you probably redeemed yourself when you saved him from the wolf.’ It is almost a whisper and James closes his eyes. 

This one he has to accept. No matter what happened when he ran toward a certain death just to save Snape from the wolf on what they now call the Terrible Snape Incident, he never once thought of himself. He wasn’t burdened by shame. None of it was his fault. Sirius had been to blame partly. Snape had been oh so stupid too. But most importantly, Remus would have suffered the most had Snape been even just slightly hurt. And he had really been afraid to lose him and Sirius that night. But he had to admit that if Remus had eventually forgiven Sirius for what had happened, then James could probably start forgiving himself for what he had himself done to Snape before. He probably should apologise, he shuddered. Not that Snape would accept it but he deserved to know that James knew how much of a prat he had been that day. He could be the better man. The quaffle would then be in Snape’s court.

They both ruminate this for a while before James starts smiling and squeezes Sirius' shoulder as a sign of peace. 

‘Thank you for this. I’ve been battling with it for a while now. Everyone is perhaps choosing a side right now, it’s getting more potent everyday. And my feelings for Lily… they just make everything so intense. I’m sorry I ever compared myself to Snape.’ He adds to bring some levity. 

‘You’re alright but yes please don’t ever do that again. As for Lily… If she’s finally started to see you for who you really are and if you’re building to become someone she can be proud to be with, she’ll see it eventually. Although I still don’t know why you’re so obsessed with her.’ whines Sirius. 

James just shoves him aside and they both start back on their mopping and cleaning. After a few minutes, in an attempt to really change the subjects, James comes down the tub to help with the scrubbing and asks:

‘How is Moony? He seemed alright last night but it’s been a stressful week for everyone.’ 

Sirius stops mid scrubbing and scratches his head. He has attached all his hair into a messy bun to keep them away from getting dirty. 

‘He’s fine, I think. I think he’s just relieved right now and avoiding thinking about it too much. Not the unicorn but the whole feeding or killing things.’ Sirius shrugs then smiles, ‘Don’t worry, I’ll keep his mind off it until I can’t and then we’ll have a brawl about it and he’ll get over it.’

That, James thinks, is probably how it will go. He smiles softly and rolls his eyes at Sirius. They both finish what they have to do in amicable silence again until out of nowhere Sirius says:

‘We need to figure out how to be there for him after school’.

James looks back at his friend who’s doing his best to avoid looking up at him. He frowns but doesn’t offer anything back just yet. Sirius fills the silence again.

‘He’s… He wants to go and transform without us. After school, I mean. He said he wanted to find remote forests and possibly meet other werewolves.’ Sirius is looking at him now, both hands nervously playing with the cloth. 

James nods before carefully asking, ‘And you don’t think it is a good idea?’. 

As predicted, Sirius’ eyes get so big with astonishment and prejudices, James wonders if they'll pop out of his face. He also wonders what else this detention has in store.

‘Do you!? Prongs, It’s insane and dangerous. We read about the other werewolves! He’ll get skinned alive and … and it’s just bloody mental. Everything we are doing to help him have somewhat of a normal life and he’ll go get murdered in some far away land! You can’t possibly not see the potential for blood, death and misery here.’ Out of breath, Sirius throws the rag down with suppressed anger - or is it fear? - and petulantly sits down in the middle of the tub, pouting.

‘I see it. But I can’t say I’m surprised by this. It’s Remus after all. He’s terrified that we’ll do something reckless - well, even more reckless than becoming illegal animagi that is - so I see him try to sort of absolve us of what he thinks might be a burden for us.’ says James calmly. 

‘It’s completely absurd, is what it is. Bloody martyr. Why does he always have to act like he has to do it alone?’ asks Sirius, still pouting.

‘Well, his life is pretty chaotic and miserable. Luckily he’s got us and none of us will stop caring about him so we’ll have to fight him on that.’ or you will have to fight him on that, thinks James. 

There’s no denying that Sirius holds a stronger influence on Remus and always has. Despite their differences or perhaps, James thinks, especially because they are so different, since there aren’t two people more different than Remus Lupin and Sirius Black. 

James and Sirius are like two sides of the same coin really. They grew up knowing exactly where they were coming from and surrounded by magic, never being afraid of who they were and what they could do. It’s no shock that they are so alike and understand each other so well. They speak the same language with the same codes. The fact that Sirius spent his whole life rebelling against his own family’s codes also helped. In James he saw exactly who he wanted to be. They were loud, obnoxious and had the naive boyish optimism of kids who were told that they could do anything. 

But Remus was another thing entirely. His whole life had been made of pain and fear. Of moving through rooms and places willing himself to be invisible. James remembers too well the first time they met in the Hogwarts express. How his eyes had been wide with surprise and apprehension and how he was almost annoyed by all the noise and the chaos. His laughs were scarce and shy. He moved to hide his scars and felt content to be listening rather than talking. 

James understands the role he himself had to play in getting Remus out of his shell. There was no denying that Remus was bright and clever and once he’d felt comfortable with them, even eleven years old James had known that Remus’ composure was hiding much more potential for life and laughs. Asking him to find spells and charms for their frequent pranks during their first year had only confirmed it. 

But it was Sirius who had brought out everything else out of Remus. It was Sirius who made Remus laugh the most and the longest. Who challenged him and frustrated him. Who would know when to probe and when to patiently await the end of the storm. The Terrible Snape Incident had put a wrench into their friendship for a while and James had been scared that they would never find each other again, understanding and supporting both of them but not being able to meddle. Sirius had betrayed almost everyone when he recklessly had led Snape to the Whomping Willow and almost got himself, Snape and Remus killed. He’d been as angry as everyone with his friend. And could not disagree with Remus when he had stopped talking to Sirius. He also could not have ignored Sirius’ hurt at what had happened, nor his guilt and his misery. It had taken them a while to find their equilibrium again but it seemed that recovering from it had casted a much stronger hold onto their relationship. They were closer than ever.

And lately, there is the touching. Sirius has always been a pretty tactical bloke, pushing, punching, hugging and manhandling. Now that he is spending hours in dog form, this is even more of a thing for him. But Sirius would always be more gentle with Remus. Not only hovering and smothering, at the ready to lighten any physical load for the boy who is always in some sort of physical pain and not just around the full moon. These days, James would be surprised if upon entering a room, Sirius and Remus wouldn’t be touching each other in some sort of way. More than once did James stumbled upon them reading in the same bed, close enough to be in each other’s laps but not quite. Sirius would always be tugging Remus some place or ruffling his hair. They would be leaning on one another, bumping heads. James even saw Sirius unconsciously moving hair away from Remus’ eyes once. He did see Remus react to it with surprise yet not mentioning it. 

Remus is more subdued in reciprocating, at least when people are around probably. But he isn’t pushing Sirius away and often starts relaxing when they are touching. Besides, whether they are touching or not, if Remus doesn’t have his nose deep in a book, he is looking at Sirius. James doesn’t know what to make of it or if they are both aware of it. What is clear though, is that it will only get stronger over time and that moments like these, with Sirius glaring at him for not offering to put Remus somewhere secluded until some sense gets back to him and they have figured out a way to keep him safe, are not to be taken lightly. 

‘But’ continues James, ‘We can’t also force him to keep away from his own kind.’ 

‘Why not?’ Challenges Sirius. 

‘He’s curious. I’d be too in his shoes. What if other werewolves are as kind and smart as him? Maybe some of them are also huge nerds who collect the most horrific sweaters on earth and have a chocolate addiction.’ James cocks his head sideways to fix a winning glare at Sirius because he knows that Sirius' strongest argument to protect Remus also probably is his weakest argument in this whole debate. ‘If someone like Remus exists, it wouldn’t be fair to not try and meet them.’ 

Sirius holds his gaze for a minute, clearly trying for a better counter argument than ‘but I don’t like it at all’ then sighs, glares at James, stands up, grabs the empty bucket behind him and walks to the tap to open it and waits until half of it is full before saying: ‘That’s what happens when people think. They get stupid ideas about love and the future. You, Remus. You are forbidden from having thoughts ever again. You can’t be trusted.’ 

‘Who’ll come up with the pranks and orchestrate them? You?’ ask James chuckling.

‘Who else? I already do that and pretty brilliantly I must add.’ he smirks while putting his sloth into the water.

‘Now that you mention it, it’s true that you aren’t usually thinking.’ starts James laughing and happy to stop having anymore conversations that involve feelings of any kind, as he starts back toward the window, ready to climb out of the tub. ‘Unless it involves doing something incredibly foolish that will put all our lives in great peril or get us expelled or food, whatever its form but usually when it’s not edible. Yes, we all ought to aspire to be you.’

Somehow he feels water dripping down his hair, face and his back before he hears Sirius emptying the bucket over his head. 

‘You know what? My stupid sounds a million times better than your stupid, stupid!’ laughs Sirius.

James slowly turns around. He can’t see Sirius since his glasses are completely soaked but still revels in the following seconds, just feeling the quiet promise of retribution and carefree, uncontrolled chaos. 

‘Let’s see, shall we?’ 


	6. Been there, done that

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This detention is not over. James and Sirius gets an unwelcome visitor and things escalate quickly.

**Saturday Morning**

**Outside the Dungeons**

Peter turns back into his human form once he is out of the dungeon. It’s not the first time that he finds himself near the Slytherins’ common room, but it might be the first time since he learned how to be an animagus. He’s very surprised by the strong scent of peppermint that came out of it once some students finally decided to show up and use the password to go in. It’s not a smell that he would have associated with Slytherins but even people who enjoy watching you trip to your own death - he would never go to the Astronomy tower alone again - or putting Essence of Insanity in your morning tea, can like the smell of fresh and nice things apparently. None of what the Marauders would do to them is as evil as what most Slytherins are doing to the rest of the school on the best of days, thought Peter. Or that’s what he had decided in any case. He was hiding in the small enclave behind one of the stone cold walls near the entrance of the dungeons. 

‘I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.’ says Peter as he taps the map with his wand. He watches it unfurl gracefully, still quite surprised that he had helped creating it in the first place. It hadn’t been easy of course and had taken years in the making (the map itself isn’t completely done either, they still need to map out different zones that they are now discovering while wandering as Animagi and figure out new charms to add to better it on a regular basis) but now that Peter can look for the names of his friends and spot everyone’s whereabouts, he is greatly disappointed no one other than James, Sirius and Remus will ever know about it. It is one of the best things he has ever done in his life. Maybe one of the last too. But it is a secret. Peter hopes that he’ll always be in on any big and important Marauders’ secret though. It is better to be the only one to know about the great things you created than to never do anything great at all. 

Finally he spots James and Sirius in the Prefects Bathroom where they most likely ended up for their detention. Satisfied, Peter taps the map again.

‘Mischief managed’ he whispers. The map closes again and once it is back in his pocket, Peter starts toward the fifth floor, thinking that he might be able to convince his friends to catch some lunch before the afternoon’s hoopla.

* * *

* * *

No one is less surprised than James when Sirius calls off the fight because his hair has been underwater for way too long. He went through almost drowning without so much of a complain - trying to drag James down with him, kicking and thrashing in the water screaming bloody murder in the throws of battle doesn’t count - and even asked for it again up until he saw his reflection in one of the windows and all of a sudden all James could hear were accusations of abuse and promises of revenge. 

They make quite a scene of course, James thinks as he takes off his shirt and finally puts back his glasses on. Sirius still is at the centre of the tub, trying to put his hair back in a sort of bun while all the taps are closed and the soap bubbles, foam and water are being sucked down the drain. 

‘I say that this was way more effective than any scrubbing. What do you say?’ asks James now putting all the dirty water buckets in a line between them and the main door. 

‘We’ve done a proper job, yes. And we’ve had worse detentions.’ agrees Sirius, being way more amenable to whatever James has to say now that they fought it out. And now that James won, obviously. 

‘Let’s gather everything up and call it quits then’ says James as he goes down the tub again to find the discarded rags.

They are still inside the tub when the door opens and a familiar but distasteful nasal voice interrupts them.

‘It’s astonishing really how the two of you always manage to render something crass even more disgraceful.’ 

James' back straightens and a ripple of loathing takes over his body. Well, so much for maybe trying to apologise to Snape, he laments. He could still do it but he would probably have to work on his immediate reaction to the other student. Sirius, of course, whips around so fast his bun falls off his head again. James takes a deep breath before turning around. Severus Snape is standing above them in his impeccable long Slytherin robes, slick greasy hair from all the potion brewing characteristically falling on either side of his pale and smirking face. 

‘Is that a compliment? I never know if you’re complimenting us or insulting us.’ says James. He hasn’t decided if he wants to act the bigger man yet. The opportunity wasn’t supposed to show itself so quickly. 

‘What do you want?’ Snarls Sirius. 

Someone told him they were here, James thinks. Lily? Probably not. Not directly anyway. These days she’s doing her best to make sure they avoid crossing paths with Snape and he’s pretty sure she’s avoiding him herself.

‘It seems your detention was unsupervised and I’ve come to remedy that. I’m not surprised to see that you aren’t even able to clean bathrooms properly.’ says Snape, ready to abuse his prefect powers again concludes James.

‘You mean that you were bored and once again realised you had no friends to spend time with you so why not come here and force us to look at your ugly face?’ says Sirius with a lot of disdain. 

James shrugs and goes to make sure all the taps are closed and clean, passing in front of Sirius and giving him a warning sign. Sirius pretends not to see while Snape replies. He can’t see his face but the tone indicates he’s probably going to let Sirius rile him up or perhaps that he came especially to start a fight with them.

‘10 points from Gryffondor for your deliberate disregard for detentions and authority.’ James turns back ready to protest but sees how calm Snape looks and just knows they’re being set up. He doesn’t have time to think of a way to not play the part though because Sirius is ready for the altercation. 

‘Do we lose bonus points, if we don’t care?’ starts Sirius. ‘Don’t you have somewhere else to be? Or a Beautification Potion to make. Merlin knows you are in dire need of one.’ he shoots.

Strangely enough, Snape barely looks irritated yet. He’s barely listening to Sirius’ best attempts at insulting him. Even James has to admit, this dance is pretty familiar for them. It’s the moment someone crosses a line that’s scaring him. Someone always crosses a line.

‘I see. You expect nothing and still get let down.’ He raises a hand in a fake apology. ‘You might be right though, I shouldn’t let you off that easy.’ Snape swipes his eyes around the room appraising. 

‘We should stay in the theme today. There are a lot of cauldrons still needing cleaning in the Potions classroom. How about after you are finished here, you go to the dungeons to fix that. Come to think of it, I just heard about Peeves, water bombs and the fourth floor being condemned. I shall let everyone know you’ll take care of that too.’ Snape is smiling now. Glints of vile satisfaction show across his face as James does his best to stay calm and Sirius’ fists turn into a not yet punch.

‘What else? I’m sure Pomfrey always needs help with cleaning the bedpans. Who knows what will happen during the game too. Think about it as making sure everything is set up for any Ravenclaw who might get injured today. I’m sorry to say that you’ll have to miss the game but two players of your calibre probably don’t need to watch the game to be ready to face us when we win.’ 

‘Take a deep breath, Potter. Don’t make it worse. Don’t play his game. You can be the bigger man here’ say the voices in James’ head. There’s always the prank later today to get back at him. Sirius motions forward and opens his mouth but James stops him, one bare arm shooting up to grab his shoulder. 

‘It’s alright, mate. Snivellus clearly came with an agenda here. Maybe when he’s done trolling us, we can get to the bottom of this. What do you really want, Snape?’ James asks with anger. 

Snape squints at James, slightly taken aback by the lack of outrage and actual fight he thought they’d be putting up by now. Ah, thinks James, there it is. Disappointment. Snape looks at James with disdain. James starts smiling. Something dark briefly passes through Snape’s eyes.

‘What do I want? Other than to watch you drown in your own piss, you mean?’ He spits out. He’s a little taken aback himself it seems and James wonders what’s brewing inside his head.

‘Eww. A pervert.’ says Sirius wrinkling his nose in disgust and looking sideway at James. ‘I’ve always said. He probably stalked us here. He’s doing that a lot, doesn’t he?’

Uh uh, thinks James. He gives a look at Sirius that says ‘Now what are you doing, mate? We do not ever again remind Snape of stalking us under any circumstances.’ But Sirius isn’t looking at him. 

‘I don’t stalk people.’ begins Snape before pausing. ‘Only **monsters**.’ 

If the room was ever cold before, now it is bloody freezing, realises James as both he and Sirius feel a wave of icy dread overwhelm them. Or it might be that he still isn’t wearing any shirt and is still completely soaked. 

‘You might want to shut up now, Snivellus. For your own good.’ threatens Sirius. 

Snape smirks once more, happy to have what he perceives as the upper hand again. 

‘Touchy.’ he turns his back to them and walks back toward the entrance of the room. ‘How was the last full moon? Did you cover up any other almost murder?’ and stops with a pointed look toward them.

Sirius is about to leap up at him so James, who would also like to murder the snake, grips him tighter. ‘Sirius, don’t! He’s taunting us!’

Snape starts laughing. It’s ugly and nasal of course and maybe he should let Sirius punch him. Maybe he should hold Snape while his friend whips off that hateful smirk.

‘Tell me, Black, is this how it is for you now? Is Potter your new mommy? If that is the kind of heir the Black Family almost had? It’s a relief that Regulus is taking the title. That’s someone with a bit more spine. He’ll do great things, I’m sure.’ 

James is a little irritated with Sirius for letting Snape get to him so easily. Didn’t they just mention being more grown up about it? He doesn’t give time to Sirius to act and turns him around to face him. James stares at his stubborn friend with a lot of supplication while Sirius’ glare just suggests bloodshed. There’s a whole silent conversation happening between them without any words actually getting past their lips and James understands that Sirius wants to pretend he doesn’t get what James is trying to say. James glances at Snape who is still glaring at them, wand’s hand shaking. He whispers to Sirius: 

‘Are you really going to let him manipulate you? After what we just talked about?’

‘I want to stuff his nose with troll poop.’ Whispers back Sirius.

‘I know.’ Says James squeezing Sirius’ shoulders.

‘And to drop him at the bottom of the Black lake. I want to watch him get eaten by the selkies.’ adds Sirius breathing hard through his bloodlust. 

‘They wouldn’t eat him. He probably tastes nasty.’ rationalises James arching an eyebrow.

‘I don’t know why Regulus is hanging about with them, Prongs. It’s driving me crazy. I should do something about it.’ laments Sirius as his eyes turn sad.

‘We’ll do something about it. I promise. But for that we need to get out of here alive and it pains me to say but with no blood on our hands either.’ begs James. 

‘You don’t even have the decency to face me. What is this Potter? What are you afraid of?’ Taunts Snape.

‘Just a little punch in the nose.’ Implores Sirius as he is doing his best impressions of a house elf waiting for orders.

‘Sirius.’ Pleads James at the end of his rope. 

‘He deserves it.’ Shoots Sirius

‘I’ll put whatever he uses as a shampoo in your hair lotion.’ Threatens James cocking his head and meaning business.

‘You wouldn’t!’ Silently screams Sirius, eyes popping. James glares back. 

‘Treason. That’s low, mate. Really low.’ He removes James’ hands away from his shoulder in a swift arms move. ‘Fine. We do this your way. You owe me.’ Shrugs Sirius as he turns away from James and snarls back at Snape. 

Severus Snape still has a smirk stuck on his face when James turns back to him.

‘So? What is going to be then? Who’s throwing the first punch?’ Taunts Snape while he plays with his wand, fully aware he is the only one in the room who actually has access to one.

‘This is boring. We’ve been there, done that, haven’t we? You stalk, we banter, someone says something incredibly stupid and we get our wands out. If nothing else, we could all do with a new script.’ Laments James making Snape snort.

‘So high of you. What do you think you are all of a sudden? Over it? You get to decide when and if I should stop hating you or getting retribution for what you’ve been doing ever since you stepped foot here?’ Hammers Snape, grasping his wand more forcefully. 

‘Retribution?’ Counters Sirius, jerking away from James. ‘He saved your life, you Blast-Ended Skank! He almost died to save you. Forget retribution and start being grateful.’

James knows this means the line has been crossed when Snape’s nostril flares and he sends them flying in one swift flick of the wrist. They don’t even hear the spell he uses which means Snape can do wordless magic pretty well and mean it. Which also means they are screwed. They’re both lying on their backs in the tub, James’ breath momentarily stuck in his ribcage. 

‘Gratitude? For almost getting me killed in the first place? I should have known. I just knew you wouldn’t stop there. As if protecting that monster within the castle isn’t enough and luring me to it wasn’t cruel! Who do you think you are!!?’ He yells, outraged and almost incoherent. ‘You wanted me to die and then you got scared and felt guilty! You know it, I know it. And soon everyone will know about it too.’

Dread fills James and Sirius gasps as if he’d been physically kicked in the guts. 

‘You can’t say anything and you won’t. You’d already have done it otherwise and we all know it.’ Says James trying to stay calm. ‘That’s not just one life that you might endanger if you talk. I’m pretty sure you don’t fucking care about other people’s lives but your own though so I’ll just remind you what you promised Dumbledore.’

‘I don’t care about Dumbledore.’ Snape spits and again uses his wand to send all the buckets filled with dirty dark water flying at them, pouring their content onto the previously cleaned bathroom floors and onto James and Sirius. James really wishes they had their wands now. Snape might not have an audience like they had when they’d humiliated him last year but he wasn’t necessarily needing one to do any damage anymore. 

‘Maybe not but you’ll come to care about us if you do anything, anything to ever harm Remus!’ Darkly threatens James, now completely over playing nice.

‘You’ll pay. All of you. The werewolf and our dear headmaster too. You’ll pay for thinking me a fool. For playing with my life. I promise you.’ Snape comes closer and starts to levitate the empty buckets in order to throw them at the boys. Sirius is half standing now, ready to jump out and tackle Snape when they are interrupted by a cold and determined female voice. 

‘Severus! Stop it!’ 

Everyone’s heads turns toward the main door and Lily is standing in a rigid and furious stance, wand out. She is glaring at Snape who suddenly recoils and drops the buckets, letting them clatter around, forcing James and Sirius to dodge them. 

‘Step away from them.’ She growls and James isn’t sure if he should feel happy or scared. 

‘Lily.’ Whispers Snape in shock. James has to hand it to him. She might have been angry at him before, she never quite took their defence with such vehemence. That’s actually not in the usual script. Snape recovers quickly enough though, as if remembering they aren’t speaking and he isn’t supposed to be scared of her or at the very least interested in what she has to say about any of this. 

‘I see. That’s the way it is now. I’m the villain and they are under your protection. After everything they did to **me**. To you even.’ Says Snape, disgusted. 

‘You see nothing. Only what you want to see. Always has been I guess. I’m only sorry I also was blind all this time.’ Announces Lily, sadly but still ready to act if necessary. ‘Leave. There’s nothing here for you to do. I’m dealing with their detention.’

‘If that’s what you call it.’ He finally turns back to them, anger still boiling. ‘They were child playing when I arrived. Insulting your authority and mine. They care about nothing. He was ready to attack me’ he continues pointing at Sirius who’s helping James up.

‘Yet you’re the only one with a wand here, Snape.’ Cuts Lily, clearly not in the mood to be lied to and James wonders how much she has heard or witnessed of the altercation.

Snape seems to recoil as if struck physically by her words and James realises that she used his last name. Expanding even more the crack that separates their past friendship to any possible future reconciliation. 

‘I won’t ask you again and you really don’t want me to report any of this or any of what you, Mulciber and Rosier are saying or doing to other students these days. Go.’ She orders. 

Snape’s jaw tightens and he glances a look back at the two wizards silently keeping away from this before locking eyes with Lily again. She moves away from the door and comes to stand closer to the bathtub. Leaving the path toward the door free for Snape who judges it a better idea to leave now rather than to risk actually fighting Lily in a magical combat. She would be ready, thinks James. And that would surely be the end of anything the two friends ever shared. Apparently Snape isn’t ready for that since he moves forward and leaves the room without any glance back at them.

Sirius and James stay unmoving shoulder to shoulder while Lily exhales and stares at the door, anger, disappointment and resignation pouring out of her. James is the first to move and without a word, he hoists himself out of the bathtub, stepping in front of her. 

‘Sorry. You weren’t supposed to .. witness any of these anymore. They weren’t supposed to happen anymore.’ He tries honestly. Sure he’d made the decision less than an hour ago to actually try and sure it really didn’t work out as planned, never had a chance to avoid it even, but he’d genuinely wanted to stop the actual fighting. Bantering and disliking each other, yes. Pranking him from time to time, yes. But not attacking each other anymore. Looking at her now, he realises that this was rather foolish. He probably should have been ready to stop it all at once and grow up first. 

Lily still isn’t looking at him when she says, sad and certain: ‘They’ll happen again.’ 

He wants to contradict her but he knows it’s pointless and she’s probably right. She finally turns toward him with a sad sigh and startles a bit when she takes a good look at him. Her eyes swipe up and down, mouth slightly agape for a nano second before closing with an audible pop and… James thinks he’s probably hallucinating but her cheeks do seem to get a new shade of pink that has nothing to do with anger. He looks down at himself puzzled and realises for the first time in a while that he’s still completely soaked and well… shirtless. Bugger. 

‘Ah, yes. Clothing. I should probably find my shirt.’ He says as she nods and decidedly picks somewhere else to look at. She’s not flustered he determines. She can’t be. 

‘I’ve used it as a rag I’m afraid.’ Finally speaks Sirius who’s now looking at them both, eyebrows high up his forehead. 

James wants to throttle him. It’s all his fault anyway. 

‘Just… go get your wands and let’s clean this mess quickly. I don’t have all afternoon.’ Says Lily tiredly. 

Sirius gets out of the tub and passes them saying, ‘Snape gave us more detentions and -’ he starts before she cuts him off.

‘And if you don’t fix this quickly I’ll actually get you to clean bedpans.’ 

Sirius starts chuckling getting toward the door before he stops short and turns around. James stops looking for his long lost shirt, looking up and meeting his friends eyes, dots connecting too. If she’s heard about the bedpans and Snape’s creative attempts for punishment, then she had been there almost all along… and heard about Remus’ secret. Both of them are frozen in space again. Sirius, always trying to protect Remus is the first to try to confirm the inevitable. 

‘You’ve heard about that then.’ He clears his throat. ‘Whatever else you might have heard here, you can safely assume that Snape was delusional. It’s now pretty clear he isn’t all … coherent when it comes to us.’ 

Nice try, thinks James. 

‘I’m not an idiot, Sirius.’ She simply states before turning to look at James. ‘Severus told me last year. He didn’t say that he’d come close to being killed by a werewolf but he had been trying to have me connect the dots about Remus for a while.’ 

James swallows hard and ignores the wave of fear coming from Sirius, only to focus on Lily. She’s daring him to lie to her too. Like before, James refuses to insult her by lying when he’s sure that she already is aware of the truth. But this isn’t about her or him. It’s about Remus. 

‘I didn’t lie. We’ll do anything to protect him.’ He declares.

She holds his eyes and after a moment nods. 

‘I know. He’s my friend too. I’ll help in any way I can.’ She promises back. Then she smiles shyly at him. All his fears and guilt or anger don’t lift away but he seems to be breathing right again for the first time in months. 

Maybe he was finally doing something right if she could smile at him like that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've always wondered how James grew up enough to become Head Boy and start dating Lily and the way I see it, he was the first of them to see their bullying tendencies for what they were. I've read many fics that explain it as him wanting to be good for Lily but I'm thinking more that it's caring for his friends and worrying for their wellbeing that got him to grow up faster. 
> 
> What do you think?
> 
> I'm writing from the Marauders POV also but I might write a fic about Severus during that time too.


	7. Trusting the Marauders

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lily's POV of the Marauders.

** Saturday Morning **

** Fifth Floor **

Hopelessly waving her hand in front of Peter Pettrigrew’s face for the fifth time in the past minute, Lily wonders how often other Prefects find themselves staring into one of the Marauders vacant expressions and empty opened eyes. How often other people find themselves wondering if or when they should panic when one of the four boys - three maybe, she’s never really seen Remus Lupin in such a predicament - inexplicably and stupidly puts himself in danger, publicly or not. Surely she cannot be the only one to always stumble upon any of their mischievous endeavours, especially the failed one. Or if she’s totally honest with herself - and she has had to really be honest with herself this morning - when someone attacks them. 

This one is probably Severus’ doing too, she deplores. She’d found Peter sitting in the middle of the stairs leading up to the Fifth floor and the Prefects bathroom. She had left Sirius and James to finish putting back cleaning rags and buckets in the storeroom and made sure to escape and get a minute to think about what had just happened. She had almost tripped on Peter then. The boy was opened mouth and almost drooling, had one hand on his wand and the other sporadically scratching the floor. She had been about to call for his friends when she heard footsteps and muffled voices coming her way. A few seconds later, James is coming to her and the still unmoving Petter.

‘I just found him like this. I suppose he must have been looking for you.’ She sighs.

‘And met Snape.’, Answers James icily. It’s not a question. Slowly he closes the gaps between them to crouch down in front of Peter and peer into his eyes, doing the very same hand motion she had tried a moment ago. 

‘What did he do to you, Pete?’ he whispers, concerned. 

‘I tried a couple spells to wake him up from whatever trance he is stuck in but nothing seems to work. I don’t think we should attempt anything else and just bring him to the hospital wing.’ She explains as James pinches Peter’s hand, shakes his shoulder and then tries a couple spells himself. ‘I told you I tried all that already.’ She adds after a moment.

‘Might have eaten something rotten or charmed. It wouldn’t be the first time his stomach got the best of him. Peter, old chap, can you hear me?’ James tries.

‘Tried that one too. Come on, Potter. Let’s --’ she says as other footsteps can be heard and Sirius joins the party. 

‘Prongsie, what are you still doing here --’ starts Sirius, slick black hair still completely soaked, steady grey eyes instantly blinking into mild confusion. ‘O Merlin’s wet trousers! What happened to Wormtail?’ 

‘Snape, we think.’ Explains James and Lily sees Sirius visibly stiffen and she gives him a sad look. 

It’s all she has energy for right now. Sadness and regrets. She’ll be angry again soon, at Severus, at herself and probably at James and Sirius as well. No one is handling anything with reason at the moment.

Sirius and James are attempting to move Peter and she is about to offer to go get someone instead, when she hears approaching footsteps coming from behind her. She turns around and Remus’ silhouette surfaces at the bottom of the stairs. He looks at them a little stunned but otherwise unsurprised to find them here and realises quite quickly that Peter isn’t well. 

‘What’s happening? Is he alright?’ enquiries Remus, worried voice, perpetually furrowed brow and Prefect badge pinned to his chest.Guilt claws at her at the sight of her friend. She knows that she’ll never betray his secret but she also knows that her knowing will probably cause a lot of anguish and uncertainty for him. It certainly doesn’t change who he is to her. She doesn’t see a monster when she looks at him. But he doesn’t want her to know and he might not react well to the fact that she now does. She also feels quite guilty for the way Severus had apparently treated Remus for the past year because of his secret. And for letting him and not asking more questions.

When Lily had decided to break her friendship with Severus - or after he made it clear what he actually thought of her and people like her - she had chosen to just disassociate herself from him. Avoiding him and removing him from her life. What she should have been doing though was to try and stop him from hurting people and getting closer to the ones who were leading him toward such darkness and exploiting his insecurities. Lily would not say that Severus is being manipulated anymore. He clearly made his own choices and followed the path he was on willingly and consciously. But she also could not forget how sweet he had been with her and who her childhood friend had been for all these years. Being blind to the present reality didn’t erase the truths held by the past either. She was ready to accept it all, she realised as she looked up at the marauders. 

‘Snape hexed him or something.’ Sirius tells Remus. 

‘Because of the fight?’ Asks Remus, mouth grim, peering into Peter’s eyes.

‘How do you know about the fight?’ Asks Lily, surprised. ‘You just arrived, how can you -’ James raises his hand at her to cut her off.

‘We told him.’ And he takes out a small folded mirror from the front pocket of his crumpled and wet shirt. ‘We use this to communicate sometimes.’ He adds as he comes down toward her and puts the mirror in her palm. From where he is crouched in front of Peter, Remus takes out his own mirror from his robes pockets. 

‘I was looking for them and called out. I wasn’t far so I came to meet them.’ Explains Remus. He isn’t looking at her so she takes the opportunity to raise her eyebrow at James. Did they have time to tell him everything in the short time it took her to leave and find Peter? Remus didn’t seem to act any different around her so they probably had kept quiet about her knowing about his secret. She felt her stomach twist with anxiety at the possibility that Remus would stop talking to her when he learned the news.

James smiles softly at her and shakes his head, confirming that their friend doesn’t know yet while Remus tries a few waking spells on Peter himself. ‘Thank you for your help Lily but we’ll take it from here. Marauders take care of each other and you’ve done more than enough for us today.’ James adds. 

‘Are you sure? I could at least go and find Sev.. find Snape to make him tell me what he did to poor Peter here.’ She offers as Remus stands and Sirius starts poking Peter’s chest, nose and cheeks with his wand. Peter is now drooling.

‘He’ll never tell you. It’s best to bring him ourselves to the hospital wing or --’, Remus is cut off from Sirius yelling.

‘Bugger, he’s coming back to himself! Ew, Pettigrew that’s my hand you are drooling on.’ Sirius says, shaking his hand in the hair as if to help removing the saliva. 

Sirius falls backward only for Remus to catch him from behind as Peter’s eyes start focusing again, mouth still slightly haggard and stumbling forward. James and Lily both come down to stop his head’s fall to the ground. 

‘Alright Peter, alright!’ James pushes him back against the stair wall as Lily grabs his face to make Peter look at her. 

‘Peter? What happened? Can you hear us? See us?’ She asks.

It takes a few seconds for anything to come out but eventually Peter starts babbling incoherently ‘It… They.. hundreds. A hundred of them. Everywhere!’ He looks at James, ‘They were everywhere, James.’ He seems to realise that James isn’t the only person around him and drops himself onto the floor again, trembling.

‘What was everywhere, Pete?’ James quizzes with a soothing voice.

‘So so many. Like a .. an invasion. Wherever you’d step there would be one. Then **they** were stepping on **me**! I was so small but they could follow and their eyes glow in the dark so it’s like … so many eyes following you. You know? Like Mrs Norris' eyes but millions of them. Yellow and .. and.. I thought I was **mad**.’ he tells the group but his eyes are still focused on James and terrified now. James shakes him a little and he looks right at Lily, concerned. 

‘Might be that he’s actually going bonkers then.’ says Sirius still half sitting and half rested against Remus’ legs and suddenly Peter’s eyes zero in on Sirius, panic and disgust in his voice: 

‘The smell, Padfoot! You know their smell! But imagine, it’s everywhere you go! And it was all running, hiding, scratching! Even when I was human but everywhere all over. Meow… Meow, meeeooww! MEOW!’ 

As Peter starts meowing, he half stands and flattens himself against the wall. James and Lily back away, eyes wide and slightly terrified. While Remus and Sirius look at each other completely at loss. Sirius is the first to gather his wits and stands looking back at James who shrugs. 

‘What the hell did that snake do to him?’ Sirius says as Peter continues meowing louder and louder, looking completely barmy. 

‘Cats? Is that what you saw, Wormtail?’ asks Remus calmly. Thank Merlin for Remus Lupin because Lily is two-seconds away from using a silencing charm. But unsurprisingly that’s James who manages to calm Peter. He comes forward and puts both hands on his friends shoulders, towering high and forcing him to look up. 

‘Wormtail! Snap out it! We’re all here now. There are no cats here.’ he yells authoritatively. Peter stops meowing but is still very frightened, trembling all over. 

‘Well except Mrs Norris and McGonagall, occasionally.’ Ventures Sirius who gets an elbow in his rib from Remus. 

‘Cats everywhere. A whole room! House! A city! A planet full of cats, Padfoot. Think about it. No dogs. They probably killed all the dogs. They were eating the rats. I had to run but there wasn’t anywhere I could hide. There wasn’t anyone to help me and I think I was me again at the end but I couldn’t speak. Every time I opened my mouth, I was meowing.’ Tells Peter slightly more coherent now but no less frightened. The rest of his friends share a look and she swears Sirius shudders. 

Lily steps closer and shoulders James who startles but doesn't move. He’s still holding Peter’s shoulder, grounding him. ‘A planet full of cats? Are you afraid of cats, Peter?’ she asks.

‘No.. I mean yes of course I am now a little of course, whenever I cross path with Mrs Norris, I have to --’ he’s cut off by Sirius who seems a little panicked and says:

‘Of course, mate! They’re vicious creatures and Mrs Norris is the worst of them. A monster, if you ask me.’ Lily grants him that, everyone is a bit afraid of the yellow eyed caretaker's cat. Even if you love cats yourself. 

‘Peter what happened? Do you remember anything prior to … err, to the cat’s planet?’ inquiries James. 

‘Did anyone attack you?’ prompts Lily. There’s no real hope he’ll say anything different than what they suspect but they could still be wrong.

Peter recoils and looks at her finally. He nods. ‘Snape showed up when I was climbing the stairs and he looked really angry so I stopped to let him pass first. I don’t know what he did but one second I was looking at him and the next I was hiding from cats and then I was here.’ Peter slides back against the wall, exhausted. 

‘Alright, let’s get you a cup of tea and we’ll … well someone will deal with Snape’ announces Remus. ‘You’ll be alright, Peter. And I don’t think we need to go to Mrs Pomfrey just yet. What do you think, Lily?’

They all look back at her again, awaiting instructions or pretending anyway. She shrugs after taking a look at Peter’s pale face. He doesn’t seem to be in any more danger. 

‘That’s fine, I think. If you somehow start daydreaming again then we can properly worry, I guess.’ She looks at James then who’s draping an arm around Peter’s shoulder and squeezing it with a soft smile and sees Peter gradually start to stand taller and smiles up gratefully at his best friend. ‘I’ll report it to the professors. He’s a prefect himself. He can’t just go around attacking and hexing people when he’s angry.’ She adds.

‘As you wish but I don’t think it’ll do any good. He clearly attacked Peter because of what just happened. ‘ says Remus.

‘What happened?’ Asks Peter, troubled now.

‘We’ll tell you on the way back.’ says Sirius. ‘Let’s go Prongs. We have a busy afternoon ahead. See you later, Evans.’ He almost turns to leave but takes Remus’ wrist instead and tugs at him. Remus shakes his head. 

‘I’ll go with Lily. You go ahead, Padfoot.’ says Remus. 

Lily doesn’t know if it’s because she knows the truth about Remus now or if it’s seeing them all together but she feels a certain fondness for them as they gather themselves to leave the stairway. Lily knows they give each other these silly nicknames. They have been for a while now but she has to admit it is one of the most endearing things about this lot. Everything else about them involves a lot of eyes rolling and familiar frustration. They are loud, arrogant, know-it-alls and mischievous, intrepid boys. She had found herself at the teasing end of many of their schemes, more often than not because of James. And she grew used to glaring at them and being annoyed by the way they always seem to act as if the world is just one big stage for them. 

But the nicknames she had found rather adorable pretty early on. Not that she would ever tell them. Something about it was heartening and made her wish that she’d have such devoted friends herself.She sees how close they are and now that she finds herself alone with them, she feels sad and empty. Echoes of moments that she shared with Severus throughout the years comes to mind. Inside jokes and secrets they brought with them to Hogwarts naively thinking that everything would stay the same even after the Sorting Hat put them in different Houses. It is the same way she feels when she goes home for the holidays or the summer and Petunia acts like she doesn’t exist anymore. As if they were never close while growing up. She had many friends, of course. Marlene and Mary were there for her and she loved them dearly. But their friendship, if beautiful, did not feel as vital or as extraordinary as the Marauders’. Somehow Lily had little doubts that the four boys would remain this close after leaving Hogwarts. They seemed to live in their own bubble where no one could understand what was shared but them. Now that she knew though, it made more sense to her. They all were protecting Remus’ secret. And she found it admirable. 

Lily watches James, Peter and Sirius start ahead. James stares intently at her then smiles softly before turning around the corner, Peter in tow. She realises as she keeps looking at the empty space he just vacated than she still hasn’t had any time to process what happened in the prefects bathroom. Especially James’ reactions and attitude toward Severus. She hadn’t planned on eavesdropping on them but she also hadn’t wanted to be the one to interfere as she could predict that her mere presence would add oil the fire. And as she was debating to go in or not, it had been clear that contrary to Sirius and Severus, James had at least tried to decrease the risk of real altercation. She held her breath when James implied that Severus was taunting them and again when she realised that he had held Sirius back. Then the only reason she didn’t try to stop them when it became clear that a fight was inevitable was because Severus had mentioned the werewolf and almost dying. That Sirius said that James saved Severus from… Remus? She might not have known the whole story but there was no way he had lied given Severus’ reaction. Shock then had kept her from acting right away and if she was completely honest: curiosity. James saving Severus from certain death wasn’t something she had ever imagined to happen. And yet, it seemed true enough and it was enough for her start looking at him differently. 

She was also fairly mortified at her reaction to his state of undress. Over and over again she seemed to be finding herself sidetracked by strange new emotions when James was concerned. And being flustered by a half naked James Potter wasn’t on her list of appropriate emotions to cultivate.

Sirius sighs dramatically and whispers ‘boring prefect duties always coming first’ but Remus squeeze the hand holding his wrist before Sirius lets go of him, following James and Peter. 

‘You don’t have to come with me, Remus. It’ll be alright.’ she explains as they go down the remaining stairs. 

‘I wanted to make sure you were good. They didn’t say much but they seemed to hint on the fact that you basically saved their asses and threatened Snape. It must not have been easy for you to do so. James was pretty impressed and kind of worried too to be honest.’ Confesses Remus.

She looks up at him. She doesn’t know if she is grateful or not right now that she knows his secret and wonders what to do now. They’re alone and she could let him know exactly what she had heard. But somehow, looking at him and his worry for her, she decides it best to ask James first if he should let Remus know or if she should confess herself.

She nods and puts her own arm through his which seems to surprise him. ‘Thank you. It’ll be a hard one to swallow for everyone I think. My guts tell me that everyone was walking on eggshells for a while now and we knew it would explode at some point. I’m just happy I showed up when I did.’

He squeezes her hands in comfort. ‘Me too.’ 

She shrugs away the events of the morning though. ‘Why do I have the distinct feeling that you are planning something?’ If Sirius’s mischievous grin before they left was any tale, something was probably going on. 

Remus eyes her warily and then starts to grin himself. ‘Us?’ She squints at him and he laughs. ‘Maybe. Don’t worry. It’ll be pretty innocent. You can trust us.’

She was doing that a lot lately. ‘Am I going to regret this? Trusting the Marauders?’ Again, she thought.

‘You have impeccable instincts. So most likely, yes. But you’ll hopefully have a good laugh too. Not a dull moment for us Marauders, you see.’ he says fondly, an undertone of naughtiness in his voice.

‘Why Mr Lupin, I’ll never understand you. Why do you let them drag you in all these?’ she asks, actually curious. You’d think that he had enough adventures to deal without them and their mischief. 

‘Why does everyone assume I’m not as wicked as them, if not more?’ he laughs. 

‘It’s that you are awfully quiet, kind, humble and reasonable, Remus. It’s as if you are trying to compensate for what the lot of them lack.’ she ventures. 

Remus rolls his eyes, ‘You sound like Sirius.’

‘Well Sirius is typically unreasonable.’ she says, reaching for the new set of stairs in front of them.

‘He is. He’s all hair and theatrics. But don’t judge us too fast, Lily. I’ve known you to be a bit more dramatic than strictly necessary more often than not. Especially around James.’ He gives her a pointed look.

‘What is that supposed to mean?’ She exclaims. 

‘And besides,’ he adds as if she hadn’t said anything, ‘It’s all very exciting, isn’t it? Breaking some rules.’

He winks at her and somehow she finds herself agreeing with him, curiosity and excitement about what they are planning bubbling in her. If they got away with hiding a unicorn, then they’ll probably get away with much more, Lily concludes as they make their way back to their common room.


	8. Hold on to your worth or you’ll be broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh he’s a dog at the door  
> Don’t need him anymore  
> And animal, animal  
> It’s just a metaphor 
> 
> \- KAWALA

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They finally set up the prank and Sirius and Remus finally talk about the woods shenanigans ... and more.

**Saturday Afternoon**

**Slytherin’s Common Room**

‘Are we sure that this is a good idea?’ Sweats Peter, coming to the stairs leading them from the Slytherin common room to the Slytherin boys dorms. ‘I say we’re pushing our luck.’

Remus who’s halfway up the stairs already, stops and turns to look down at Peter who hesitates to climb the stairs. Between them James and Sirius, wands out, turn around to look him too. 

‘A bit late for getting cold feet, Wormtail.’ Says Sirius. ‘Don’t worry if anyone comes up unexpectedly - and no one will -’ he points out brandishing the Map, ‘you can transform and you’ll be alright.’ 

‘I’ll be guilty by association. If they find the three of you, they’ll just assume I was in on it.’ Counters Peter.

‘And rightly so. Isn’t it the Marauders’ way?’ Taunts Sirius. 

‘It’ll be alright, Wormtail.’ Says James calmly as he goes back down to put a hand on Peter’s shoulder. ‘It’s only a few more rooms. You can’t possibly be satisfied by the opportunity that the common room offers. They barely have any furniture!’ 

Remus chuckles at his friend’s melodramatic assessment of the situation even if he is fairly unsatisfied himself with the idea of keeping the prank contained to the common room only.

‘We didn’t spend all that time perfecting the spells for something so anticlimactic.’ Acquiesces Sirius.

‘ **I** haven’t spent all that time perfecting the spells for something so anticlimactic. Yes.’ Corrects Remus looking at Sirius. His friends has zero remorse, just rolls his eyes and jabs his wand into Remus’ ribs.

‘Come on! We’re wasting time.’ Insists Sirius, coming up against Remus and pushing him forward with his whole body. 

Remus complies and reaches the first level of dormitories. He stops for a heartbeat before deciding to get to the very last level and hears Sirius protest.

‘Let’s start with the Seventh years and do the rest on our way down. That way if we run out of time, we are at least certain not to miss any of the Sixth and Fifth years either.’ 

Remus is much more interested in the oldest Slytherins reactions and their cries of outrage than those of any first years’. Sirius seems to agree since he’s grinning at him and almost collides into Remus again, eager to bypass him and be the first to reach their targeted rooms.

The seventh year Slytherins dorm room instantly feels foreign to Remus. First it is larger than their own dorm. There are four large canopy beds, two on the left and two on the right, facing each other. And four large glass windows currently bringing much of the light in the dark walled room. The tapestry on the wall representing ancient forests and knights tales envelopes most of the floor too. They each have a desk near their beds. It feels colder and less welcoming than their own dorm, thinks Remus but that wouldn’t be hard to achieve when your room is in a dungeon. Their own vivid Gryffindor gold and crimson probably does a lot to help hiding how cold the castle can feel. Or maybe it’s the fresh peppermint smell that overwhelms his own senses. 

The four marauders stand shoulders to shoulders, evaluating the space they are about to play with. Much to Remus satisfaction, a teenage boy’s dorm room remains as chaotic no matter your house, with books, pens, parchments and various items of clothings and personal heirlooms scattered on beds, floors and desks. That would do nicely, silently appreciate Remus. 

‘Shall we?’ James invites, raising his wand. 

One by one the boys nod. James is the first to start. His main contribution to the prank had been to master how to combine the Levicorpus jinx with the pretty standard Levioso charm that he excels at, once Remus had explained what would probably be necessary. So that, just like now, objects and furniture would levitate upside down. The others had helped with fine tuning the details of the charm so that it worked at a bigger scale than just a couple objects at the same time. Everything was now levitating upside down above their heads and Remus smiled. 

James had been a bit recalcitrant at the mention of Levicorpus which had surprised Remus who remembered distinctly James using that spell every opportunity he had throughout the past year. Recent events with Snape had confirmed Remus’ suspicions that James was feeling somewhat guilty for his past bullying. Remus couldn’t disagree that they all should probably refrain from humiliating anyone any further but everything that happened since James had used Levicorpus on Snape for the first and last time is now so much bigger and cruel than what he had imagined it could be today. And he just isn’t sure where to go from there. 

Growing up Remus had had difficulties seeing Slytherins and Snape as anything else than evil. He was too wrapped up in his own predicaments and being friend with Sirius Black had only furthered his prejudices. Between being scared to be bullied for his lycanthropy and the House of Black constantly casting a shadow in their lives, Regulus being sorted in Slytherin despite his love and relationship with his older brother and Snape hating them so much that no one could remember how it had started, Remus had spent very little time questioning their own blame and intentions. Only recently did he start to see the way the teachers and the Headmaster were looking at the Slytherins. He had heard the rumours and it was now pretty clear that this Dark Lord who was recruiting wizards and prominent old pure blood families within his ranks was heavily getting support from Slytherins. Tension in the school was getting to a very potent point. 

That’s why James had suggested that they would prank the entire school, only to realise that it wouldn’t be possible due to the time restriction they had. And Remus had frowned at his attempt at proposing Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff or even their own House. It only dawned on him now that James was starting to feel uneasy about solely focusing on the Slytherins and that it probably had to do with his past own behaviour as well as what he was reading in the Daily Prophet or in his father’s letters. 

But Sirius had insisted and given the practicalities of this particular prank, they had all agreed to focus on the Slytherin dorms anyway. Remus promised himself that he would talk to James soon about it and for now to let himself enjoy the moment.

James nods at them eyes still focused on keeping everything to fall down before they get to the next step and meticulously, Sirius and Remus both work in sync on the semi permanent Sticking charm that would keep the furniture fastened to the room ceilings. As soon as everything clicks into place, Peter starts on with the incantation that would unmake their work but only after a specific set period of time. Making sure that nothing would actually fall and be destroyed upon descending back on the floor through the law of gravity. 

Once they are done, Sirius goes to the centre of the room, neck falling backward, a huge grin plastered on his face as his admires their work. 

‘I really hope they get creative when they try to reverse the spell. Wormtail, I think you should stay here until they arrive and hide in a corner so that you can actually witness their reactions and give us a complete rendition of what they do and say.’ Proposes Sirius.

‘I would but there’s no way I’ll stay up here alone waiting for Slytherins to come back. Being hexed once a day is all I can stomach.’ Says Peter petulantly. 

‘You could just stay in Snivellus’ room them. You deserve to see him enraged and powerless.’ Offers Sirius.

‘No.’Hammers Peter.

‘No one is staying here, Wormtail, don’t worry.’ Promises James as he reaches Sirius and reinforces the sticking charm in certain spots. ‘But we better get a move on if we really want to get back at Snape.’ He adds. 

Satisfied with their work, they start going down to the Sixth year dorm room which offers pretty much the same picture than the first room. Sirius is the first to find Snape’s bed of course and Remus rolls his eyes when he sees his devilish friend take out a dungbomb from inside his robes and place it under Snape’s bed sheets before winking at them as they start levitating things to the ceiling again. 

They work in unison and with ease for a few long minutes. After a while, as Peter is peering out one of the main window to check on the view from the dungeons and James is inspecting their work with an excited pep in his steps, Remus walks to where Sirius is making sure that nothing is out of order with Snape’s bed. He takes the map from Sirius inside robe’s pocket and checks if anyone is making their way to them. Everything seems rather clear from what the map says and Sirius, apparently reassured that Snape won’t be able to sleep in his own bed tonight, snatches the map away and drops an arm around Remus shoulder. 

‘You do great work under pressure, Moony.’ Says Sirius, warm against Remus’ side and looking at the ceiling with approval before turning his head to look at Remus. ‘Think of all the things you could achieve if you spent all these hours worrying about everything and just used them for plotting instead!’ He teases.

Remus rolls his eyes again but doesn’t say anything. He’s well aware of how useless all of this week’s worries had been in the grand scheme of things. It hadn’t help with the unicorns, his friends had just taken care of it, almost getting killed by centaurs in the process and getting a detention that apparently almost ended in tragedy. None of what Remus had lost sleep over could have changed any of that nor had helped quell his guilt and feeling of being useless to them. Remus is used to feeling like he’s strapped to a chair looking at the door. It’s not just a feeling for him, especially when he can remember being strapped in a room, mere minutes before turning into the wolf. Waiting for the beating down to happen even if not knowing exactly when it’ll occur. It’s no great epiphany to understand why this sense of constant foreboding wakes him up in the middle of the night or gets him paralysed with guilt. So yes, he’s just that happy that he managed to help with the prank and to actually be of use for something other than bringing great peril to his best friends. 

‘I just made you worry again, didn’t I?’ whispers Sirius, tearing Remus away from the dark thoughts clouding his mind. Sirius is now pouting. 

Remus holds his gaze and stares into Sirius’ sharp and penetrating eyes. His own breath catches and he can feel himself reaching for Sirius’ robe suddenly at loss for words. Something pulls at him, deep in his heart. He wants to say that it’s alright because no matter how long and dark the pathway to sorrow and worry, there’s always Sirius at the end, reaching for his hand and leading him to the back door, where it’s light and clear and alive. When time moves too fast and Remus can’t breath, when his peripheral vision shortens, trapping him, unmoving, Sirius is the one to stop it and play it back, giving Remus the moment back. Small talks and light-hearted jokes battling nagging doubts and dark conclusions. 

Instead he smiles softly and looking down at his hands, he shakes the hem or Sirius’ robes lightly. He looks down between them and shrugs. 

‘No. I did that to myself.’

‘That you did. Hey look up, Moony.’ Softy orders Sirius and Remus does. He thinks he can hear it in Sirius’ silent gaze then. The unspoken ‘And I will always to be there’ that Remus craves to hear even if he won’t allow himself to believe it. 

He smiles at Remus and tilts his head sideway. ‘It’s alright. We’re out of the woods now.’ And winks. Remus gets lost in the moment, vaguely aware he’d like to stay forever in this moment. 

But someone - Peter - clears his throat and just like that Remus is left without Sirius eyes on him. He turns around to find Peter frowning at them and James standing arms crossed over his chest and leaning in the doorway, eyes dancing with fake exasperation. He is looking at them with affection and smirks when his eyes drop on Remus’ hand still holding Sirius’ robes. Remus’ hand drops back to his side and he can feel his neck heat up. 

He really needs to control himself around Sirius more. He’s very aware of how much he is losing strands of time looking at Sirius or made unable to think when they are together. And Remus is pretty sure James can tell. Because James is glued to Sirius as much, if not more than Remus and never ever ever has to be fished out of his reverie, only to realise he got flustered by a smile, a hypnotic grey look or full-body hug. 

Remus’ mouth drops into a smile and turning back to Sirius he says ‘Until next time.’ Which earns him a grin and just like that everything is just as it should be.

* * *

* * *

**Saturday Afternoon**

**Outside the kitchens**

‘I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.’ Whispers Remus before stepping out of the kitchens, waving goodbye to the happy and busy house elves getting ready for supper right now. He checks his immediate vicinity for anyone from the staff. Just because everyone is still supposed to be at the game doesn’t mean it’s time to get reckless. His pockets are full of cakes and chocolate which he intends to bring to their dorm to fill up his personal stash. Even if he isn’t violating any rules, wandering about the castle during the day, he’s probably not supposed to go to the kitchen while everyone is away on the Quidditch field and steal food. He’s still a prefect after all. But he’s also a very hungry teenager with a werewolf metabolism. Certain that the coast is clear, Remus starts his way to the Gryffindor common room, passing in front of the Great Hall doors, feeling content with the afternoon’s unproblematic adventures going exactly according to plan. 

They managed to take care of the Fifth and Fourth years Slytherins dorm rooms pretty easily before James had suggested that they head back for the Quidditch field. Sirius had whined a bit that Slytherins midgets would get away unarmed but Remus had offered the compromise of just using the semi permanent sticking charm on certain objects in their rooms or bathroom doors to confuse everyone. Then the three boys had left under the cloak toward the game while Remus had preferred to stay behind. Remus was generally suffering through Quidditch games only when his friends were playing or during practice when they asked him to attend. What he wanted now was to get some quiet alone time in his room. He had just detoured to the kitchen on whim first. 

Munching on a chocolate bar while looking at the map and walking slowly through the corridors of the castles, he wonders how long the game would be lasting now. It had already been almost two hours. They had gotten into work as soon as the last Slytherins had left the dungeons so they had had a pretty good head start but still. Remus is about to close the map when he spots the **Sirius Black** name tag near the Transfiguration classroom. Blinking to make sure he isn’t dreaming, Remus frowns as the dot on the map doesn’t seem to be moving. Incidentally he can see **Peeves** name next to his friend’s. There’s no reason for Sirius to be elsewhere than the Quidditch pitch right now and Remus checks once again if students are making their way back to the castle but everyone remains where they are supposed to be. Everyone except Sirius. 

Worried now, Remus makes his way toward his friend, crossing the Middle Courtyard and cursing the weight of his full pockets slowing him down. He’s almost near the classroom when he hears Sirius’ voice.

‘And remember: timing is important. It’s best to wait for them to be all together.’ 

‘Together! Together! Weeeeeee’ chants Peeves.

‘Brilliant! You’ll get another one later if this one is a success and I promise you’ll be ableto use it however you wish.’ Assures Sirius. ‘Go now and good luck!’ 

Remus turns the corner that leads to the large corridor in time to see Peeves fly away in the opposite direction and crossing a wall all the while doing his best impressions of someone’s machiavellian laughter, which echoes even after he goes through the wall. He halts in front of the classroom’s large doors coming face to face with a disheveled Sirius who’s grin turns into a surprised face when he realises that someone is here and that this someone is Remus.

‘Moony?! What-’ he starts.

‘No, you first! Why aren’t you at the game? What are you doing, Padfoot? Peeves, really?’ Interrogates Remus. 

‘Bollocks, you weren’t supposed to hear that. It’s a surprise.’ Mumbles Sirius, crossings his arms over his chest. 

‘A surprise that involves Peeves?’ Wonders Remus.

‘Yes.’ 

‘Care to elaborate?’ 

‘Nope.’ 

‘We already have a plan in motion and I’m fairly certain I would have remembered if it had anything to do with Peeves.’Insists Remus.

‘Like I said, this one is a surprise and it’s a surprise for everyone. Why do you think I came here **alone**?’ Asks Sirius raising a brow. ‘Trust me.’ And ‘Is that chocolate?’ 

Remus snorts shamelessly at that, hiding his hands - and the chocolate bar - into his pockets. ‘Trust me he says! Thirty seconds after I’ve heard him make a deal with a devious poltergeist who’s favourite pastime involves wrecking havoc wherever he can. Trust you? You’re a menace.’

‘Thank you’ says Sirius and bows with ceremony as if he just received the most wonderful compliment. ‘That’s my only aspiration in life, you know? I live for greatness but I’ve found that it can mostly be born out of chaos and spectacular disaster.’ Sirius comes closer, eyeing Remus’ pockets with great interests.

‘I have no doubts you’ll achieve great things. Maybe you’ll die here and come back as a ghost or as a poltergeist too. You and Peeve can hold hands and take siege to the castle.’ Mocks Remus, taking a step back.

‘Maybe. But who will take care of you if I’m gone?’ Enquires Sirius, stopping close enough to first reach inside Remus’ left pocket, plucking out one chocolate bar and reaching for the map with his right hand. 

‘I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.’ Whines Remus, giving Sirius a stinking eye for helping himself to his personal goods. Sirius just wiggles his eyebrows and puts it inside his own pockets. ‘I had a life before I came here and met you.’ Remus reminds Sirius just as his friends checks the map. ‘It was already tumultuous enough and I think it’s the only reason I survived you and James.’

‘Barely survived.’ Says Sirius without looking at him and then whispers ‘Mischief managed’ pointing his wand to the map which turns blank and folds itself. ‘The game is over, they’re all marching back to the castle. Let’s go.’ He adds, grabbing Remus’ wrist and pulling him back through the corridor he came from. ‘Besides, I’ve realised that it would please my family too much if I was to die here instead of remaining a breathing and living stain, forever tarnishing the Black family name, you know. I just can’t do that. If it means that I can continue to be the wise voice of reason in your moments of need, then it’s a win-win.’ 

‘Yes, because I, the prefect, really need your input, Mr I-can-sniff-my-own-butt Black.’ Laughs Remus.

‘Oi! What ever I do in dog form cannot be used against me. I’m a dog. That’s the whole point of it. I don’t hold what the wolf does against you.’ Counters Sirius, bringing Remus closer so that they can be walking at the same pace. He doesn’t let go of Remus wrist. Remus doesn’t mind. 

‘I’ll make sure to come and ask for your advice before I do anything if you ever die and haunts the castle’s grounds. I wouldn’t want you to worry sick about me even in death.’ Offers Remus.

‘Not good enough. You’ll head first into trouble and come whining after the facts. I just know you.’ Ascertains Sirius. 

‘What do even think I’ll find myself into without you, Sirius?’

‘Knowing you? The possibilities are endless.’ Suddenly glares Sirius as if Remus’ entire existence resolves around tormenting him. ‘Exhibit A: You got bitten by a werewolf.’ 

‘You became an illegal Animagus. Willingly.’ Retaliates Remus, defending himself. 

‘Exhibit B: You became a prefect.’ Continues Sirius not caring.

‘I was made a prefect.’ Huffs Remus. 

‘Which is worse. You made them all think you are respectable and sensible. Now you feel entitled to your own fantasies.’ Sirius drags Remus into the staircase. 

‘My own fantasies?’ Remus struggles to keep up and they both almost collapse halfway up. 

‘Yes’ acquiesces Sirius ‘Thinking that you are indeed sensible. Going around giving us lessons about having a plan of action or doing researches.’ 

‘How many times did my plans and researches serve you? Our saved your wizard’s broom heads?’ Inquires Remus as they reach the top of the stairs. 

‘That’s the thing, Moony. It usually saves us but it also generally puts **you** in some sort of peril.’ Says Sirius and it crosses Remus’ mind that maybe, just maybe, he’s not joking anymore. 

Remus suddenly bypasses Sirius, now being the one to drag him forward. He stops into the nearest alcove he can see. They are both facing each other, out of breath from climbing the stairs. 

‘What great peril are you talking about Padfoot?’ Asks Remus, very seriously. 

Sirius hesitates for a moment, clearly assessing if he should actually speak his mind or just brush it off. ‘Telling the centaurs about the wolf.’ He finally tells Remus, mouth grim and accusing eyes. 

‘Sirius.’ Starts Remus with a sigh. ‘I knew you would throw a fit about this. But it did save your butts, didn’t it?’ 

‘I’m not throwing a fit. I merely pointing out how stupid it was. We would have found a way.’ Sirius is glaring at him again.

‘What way?’ 

‘I don’t know. But we would have thought of something and figured it out. Just hearing your concerns made Alandras more sympathetic to us. It would have been fine. All you had to do was to confirm that there might have been a monster in the castle. You really didn’t have to specifically point out that it was a wolf. What if they tell someone?’ Retorts Sirius. 

‘I don’t think Centaurs like us very much and just go around telling people anything.’ Utters Remus now getting somewhat irritated. 

‘You think but you don’t know. I’m just .. I just wish you’d be a bit less careless with selling out the wolf. Now that Evans knows too, it just feels like so many people are walking around with a big bomb ready to explode. This isn’t an Exploding Snap game, Moony.’ Admonishes Sirius, backing away and bumping against the alcove’s back wall. He realises that he can’t get any further and just balls his hands into fists. 

‘Selling out the wolf?’ Asks Remus angrily. ‘What is it that you want from me exactly? Lily knowing? It was all Snape. And who basically let Snape in on it, Sirius?’. Sirius winces and his jaw locks. ‘You act as if it’s all a game. Everything. It just fun for you. You get to do cool things and go on great adventures while I’m terrified to breathe wrong most days of my life. You’re angry at me because I take the wolf too seriously? I’m sorry that I don’t really have the luxury to hope for you to always find a way when you are out and about to risk your own lives f—’

‘Exactly! Our own lives, Moony!’ Exclaims Sirius, pushing himself away from the wall and invading Remus’ personal space once again. ‘We put our own lives at risk. You really don’t have to ruin everything whenever you get the chance to sacrifice yourself for us. Because we chose to do it. You don’t have to feel guilty. It’s like you have the self preservation instinct of a Niffler!!’ Yells Sirius pointing his finger into Remus’ chest repeatedly.

Remus feels something twists deep in his guts and grabs Sirius’ hand mid movement. They are yelling at each other but not listening. And he needs Sirius to understand. He needs him to know exactly what he feels like every time his friends transform and join him as he turns into the werewolf. Every single time they risk everything and enter the woods. That he can remember only a flicker of what the werewolf witnesses and goes through the entire time and how he’s just left with blanks. The blanks feel less terrifying and he feels a little less empty now that they join him. The wolf feels less alone and therefore doesn’t hurt himself anymore and Remus can feel that when he wakes up. Less angry and desperate. But he still feels lost and hurt. 

Sirius needs to know that every time Remus wakes up in the Shack and later in the infirmary, covered in stitches and bandages, his first thought is of helplessness. Until he realises that the sun came up and looks up to see them looking at him, exhausted but smiling. And he wants to cry, every single time because how did he get so lucky? And how could he even fathom losing them? 

Remus fights back tears of anger and frustration, he takes a deep breathe and hopes to translate exactly how desperate he his to keep them all into his life, even if it means  putting himself in danger. It’s only fair seeing how just befriending him puts them in constant danger. He inhales and anger deserts him, opening him up to fear and vulnerability. 

‘Most people are afraid of the dark, aren’t they? Or they are afraid of the monsters that lurk in the dark. That’s what they fear first, right? What they don’t know or what they can’t see or feel yet terrifies them. But me? I know the dark. That’s where I am whenever I turn. I collapse on myself and my mind isn’t mine anymore. It’s just darkness.’ Remus blinks back unshed tears. ’For me? The monsters in the dark forest? They are just trees. **I am** the monster people should be afraid of. And you know better than anyone else that pain doesn’t kill me. I turn and my body tears and cuts and screams and still I get stronger and sharper.’ He looks up to Sirius. ‘I told you. I told you that I’m scared of what I’ll do outside of Hogwarts. Potentially killing the unicorn was the first example of what could happen once we’re out and you’re not always with me. And the idea of killing something is dreadful enough. But maybe losing myself even more to the wolf is so much worse, Sirius. Letting him take over and surrendering even more to the blanks of time where you are with him but I’m not with you? It’s unbearable just to think of it!’

‘Remus.’ Whispers Sirius now rendered speechless. He tries to comfort Remus by coming closer and trying for a hug but Remus stops him, one hand resting on Sirius chest while he realises the other one is now holding half of Sirius’ hand instead of his wrist. 

‘I know most of the fears everyone loses sleep over. But what I don’t know is how I’ll be if I lose you. I know what it was like before you. **I don’t know** what I’ll become and how I’ll survive without you. You gave me everything and maybe I’ll end up with nothing.’ Remus exhales, wide open and unguarded. 

There are a few heartbeats and a few exhales before Sirius’s voice echoes in the alcove, hoarse with emotion.

‘And what makes you think that it’ll be any less different for us. For… for me?’ He asks, forcing Remus to look at him by tugging his arm toward himself. 

‘What?’ Breathes Remus, transfixed. 

‘What makes you think that losing **you** would set us free?’ Insists Sirius. ‘I for one, have no desire to be set free of you, even if you believe that you are some kind of burden. Because that’s what it is, isn’t it? You think of us as everything and yourself as the burden.’ He waits for Remus to refute this but Remus could not speak if he wanted right now. It seems as if they have had this conversation before but not exactly like this. Not with such honesty.

‘I’d ask James and Peter but when they decided to become Animagi, I’m pretty sure they did it out love too. You going around acting like you’re entitled to decide for us when taking care of you or protecting you is a step too far is an insult to that.’ Continues Sirius, now driven with some sort of quest for the truth. ‘You say you are lucky to have us and you are bloody right you are. But setting yourself for self sacrifice doesn’t really honour that, Moony. It just says that we decided to risk so much for something of so little importance when it’s the exact opposite.’ 

Sirius suddenly pauses and takes a closer step. The alcove that seemed previously so narrow now seems too wide as they are but one tiny mass of limbs and bodies desperately trying to get to each other without ever taking the final step. Remus doesn’t think he can move anymore, voice caught in his throat. He feels like he just ripped out his heart and offered it to Sirius. And it’s still beating in the palm of his hand, awaiting to see what the other boy will do with it. He is so afraid to accept what he thinks and hopes he’s hearing that he’s barely breathing, unmoving. Sirius just takes matters into his own hands and in a heartbeat movement, eyes clear and bright, he swiftly removes his arms and hands from Remus’ grasp, only to hold his hands himself, a strange look on his face, before saying: 

‘We’re foolish but we are not fools. Moony, you are not unimportant and I don’t want to live in a world where you were there and then you weren’t, either.’ Then he smiles that big Sirius smile which not only brings light to Remus’ grey surroundings but paints everything multicolour. ‘How about we just don’t let go of each other and see where it takes us?’

Later, Sirius will make fun of Remus for being such a romantic sap but Remus won’t mind. He’ll always remember how it felt to completely loose himself to the moment, to Sirius and to come crashing against him. To wrap his arm around Sirius’ chest, to grab his face in his hand and to just kiss him. To let go of his fears. He would always remember. And so would the wolf, Remus likes to think. To store inside their minds, how Sirius had stood frozen for a small moment and let Remus smother him with the sloppiest kiss ever. Before waking up and pushing Remus slightly away so he could look into his eyes and ask silently if he really meant it. How he had looked when Remus had nodded shyly but determined for this to happen. And how they had finally reached for each other almost in sync and desperate for more, for each other, hands holding and fisted in each other’s cloths. How they had stayed there for a long moment, unable to stop, almost suffocating into each other mouths before just leaving feather like kisses on each other lips when it became almost too much. 

They stayed there, unwilling to break the moment up until they started to hear noises from the castle and had to accept that it wasn’t just theirs anymore.

Sirius huffs in Remus’ mouth and leaves a last kiss before stepping back. Remus protests and puts his front head on Sirius’s shoulder. Unable to look him in the eyes now that they aren’t kissing anymore. Everything crashing down in him, he’s almost drunk with sensations and emotions. 

‘I’ve always said we had the best fights.’ Jokes Sirius, breaking the silence.

Remus chuckles and still afraid to untangle himself from Sirius, reaches a hand under his robes to hug him one last time. 

‘Moony?’ 

‘Just one moment. This just rocked my entire world, I’m processing.’ Interjects Remus, not moving.

‘Well process faster. People are coming and I really don’t feel like sharing this moment with them just yet.’ He reaches to hug Remus closer as well, though. ‘and you’re welcome.’ 

‘For what?’ 

‘For rocking your world.’

Remus groans and Sirius starts laughing, feeling pretty happy with himself. He finally steps back and looks at Sirius from a socially appropriate distance. Sirius looks positively gorgeous, hair falling down his face, eyes bright and dancing, cheeks colouring with patches of pink and grinning at him. Remus can’t believe his chance and automatically starts to reach for Sirius’ hand again. Until he actually sees his own hand that his. 

‘What is… Is that **glitter**?’ He asks, incredulous. 

Sirius just collapses from laughter while Remus tries to shake the glittering mess that covers his hand and robe, just realising now that Sirius is also covered in glitter inside his robes.

Remus just then knows that his puzzle might never show the full picture but it doesn’t matter as long as the Sirius’ pieces always fits somewhere in it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just love them with all my heart.


	9. Controlled chaos

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Persist, pivot, or concede. It’s up to us, our choice every time.”  
> ― Matthew McConaughey, Greenlights

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter! 
> 
> Everyone awaits to see how Slytherins react to the prank. It's a multiple POV chapter as most characters come to terms with their recent understandings of their feelings. 
> 
> If you've been reading to this chapter, thank you!

**Saturday Evening**

**Hogwarts Great Hall**

‘Peter! Stop it!’ Hisses Sirius as Peter turns around to glance at the Great Hall entrance for the third time in the last five minutes. 

Sirius glares at him vehemently and Peter at least has the decency to look sorry. The young wizard is not so foolish as to think that people won’t instantly assume that the Marauders are behind the prank as soon as the Slytherins would be making their entrance for dinner. But giving them the ammunition to prove them guilty was another thing entirely. Sirius is well adept to the art of waiting contentedly for unleashed mayhem to erupt and rather enjoys the quiet before the storm. Looking at James in front of him, who is peacefully reading through the Quidditch notes taken by very attentive and devoted first years, Sirius silently appreciates that his best friend also seems undisturbed by the anticipation. Peter always finds it a bit harder to focus on anything else while they are waiting for the result of their hard labor to come to fruition and often has to be severely watched. Usually it’s his need for James to be happy or proud that keeps him from selling them out. But everyone is tired today and for once Sirius is eager for the grand finale to happen so they can go celebrate in their dorms, away from everyone and preferably by lazily lying in bed and eating Remus’ stash of chocolate. 

**Remus**. Sirius turns sideway to sneak a peek at him and he doesn’t know if he is surprised or not to find that Remus is already not so discreetly watching him. Their eyes lock and a soft shade of pink makes its way across Remus’ cheeks, somehow contrasting with his scars. But he doesn’t break eye contact or attempts to hide his grin. He only raises his elbow on the table and cups his chin in his hand, angling himself so that he can comfortably look at Sirius uninterrupted.

Sirius wants to reach out and kiss him again. It’s been like this since their first kiss and yes, in the grand scheme of things it hasn’t even been a couple hours ago but Sirius is nothing but extremely eager to steer away from everyone and find another alcove so that they can try it again. 

He grins back at Remus sheepishly as his heart soars lightly.

Kiss or no kiss, Sirius thinks that the whole fight would have changed things between them anyway. It needed to happen if only because Sirius was feeling more and more like Remus was slipping away from them. From him. The more Remus had worried - in addition to the whole debacle with the unicorn, even before the centaurs had entered the plot - the stronger Sirius’ guts had told him that Remus was going to do something stupid soon. He hadn’t even realised just how pissed he had been at him for telling the centaurs about the wolf. Not until the blowup with Snape this morning. 

Looking at Remus now, Sirius reaches for the boy’s hand under the table. Remus frowns but complies, glancing at Peter and James quickly. Their fingers meet, lying where their knees touch. Sirius caresses Remus’ palm lightly. 

Trying and succeeding at becoming animagi to help Remus had just been one part of the history of their friendship. They were Marauders and for Sirius it was pretty clear right from the start that they were going to do great things. He was well aware of how easier it had become for Remus to turn now that they could be there with him and it had always been their first motivation for doing it. But Sirius started to suspect that the fun of it, the challenge and the adventures that it had promised, were giving Remus the impression that they didn’t take it so seriously anymore. He might have been right and they might have been a bit more cocky lately but with all the worrying that the young werewolf was known for, Sirius hadn’t seen the urgency in reassuring him. Sirius Black went with the flow of things while Remus Lupin needed to know what to expect prior to anything they were about to undertake.

Everyone seemed to overlook what the bond, the secret and the choice of taking such a risk actually meant. It seemed that Remus most of all thought that his friends were taking things for granted. And before the Terrible Snape Incident, it might have been true. They were acting and feeling on top of the world for succeeding in mastering higher levels of magic before anyone else and having more fun than most people. But Sirius never took it for granted. They had worked hard for years to become Animagi. They had studied and researched for the map like never before. They should be proud of their achievements and use them to have fun. They were helping their friends and living the life.

But he could see why Remus had come to a different conclusion. It said more about how he saw himself than about what he thought of his friends. The Terrible Snape Incident and its consequences made them all realise different things. For Sirius, it was the moment he almost ruined everything. He had put not only Remus and Snape in danger but James and Peter too and probably the whole school as well. However, if everyone was right to blame his recklessness and if they were also right to use it as a reminder that they weren’t invincible, Sirius never perceived what they were doing as bad or superficial. It all but made it impossible for him to not face how scared he had been to lose them all and how far they would go to protect Remus. Once the guilt had somewhat subsided, Sirius had seen things clearly.

James had saved Snape against all his instincts and at the peril of his own life. For Remus. Peter had been terrified for his friend and so angry at Sirius, throwing himself at Remus the second they were sure he was safe. And Sirius had but almost died himself from dread and worry. Worse, he had been ready to go and smash Snape’s head against the Weeping Willow himself if it could have saved Remus and was fully aware of the implication of it. If this wasn’t proof enough that they were all motivated by love then he didn’t know what was. They’d do everything to keep Remus in their lives.

The real problem of it all wasn’t that they were taking risks for Remus on an everyday basis. James’ confession earlier today was confirmation of that. They were all mostly loosing sight of how fast their prejudices and hatred for Snape and the Slytherins were clouding their judgements. Not that they weren’t entitled to some of it but Sirius was forced to admit that they were not helping the situation. Now looking at Remus and thinking back on James’ face when he compared himself to Snape or even remembering Lily’s sadness after she had to intervene, it was getting out of hand. 

Looking at the empty Slytherin table and thinking of their prank right now, he just could not find in himself to feel guilty though. Something bad was brewing outside, in the real world. He had been the first to see it growing up. It was all but everywhere when he looked at his life; from the long dinners listening to his parents complain about how magic was being tainted, to losing Andromeda because she loved someone that they deemed inferior to them, and now losing Regulus to dark magic and pureblood supremacists. Being disowned and thrown out of his family for believing in something less extremist than the people he depended on. Even more these days with the blatant discrimination innocent students were suffering that Dumbledore wasn’t taking real actions to stop.

That’s what was overwhelming him on most days and what prompted him to tempt Snape that day. He forgot about everything else. He forgot about the Marauders’ honour and keeping Remus safe because looking at Snape, all he had felt was anger. He had opened his mouth wanting to hurt and to see Snape feel as helpless and small as he had often felt himself. And it had spectacularly backfired because whatever Snape was feeling that day, it had motivated him enough to act too. 

Now troubled, Sirius trades his fingers between Remus’ and grips tightly. 

What the unicorn episode had uncovered though had surprised Sirius. He had no doubts that Remus loved them back. He just hadn’t realised that Remus felt jealous of the wolf somehow. Sure, they were all mostly separating the werewolf from the conscious Remus but it was becoming less clear when they were in the woods playing and racing. Padfoot was feeling as strongly for the wolf as Sirius was for Remus. They were still a pack. Marauders. It had been a while since the wolf had really tried to steer clear from the forest, forcing them to herd him back within the trees. So Sirius had just forgotten somehow that Remus couldn’t remember most of what happened when he was the wolf and hadn’t seen that Remus was resenting the wolf for getting to spend time with them and not … himself. It makes sense, thinks Sirius, that Remus would feel helpless and resentful. He’d always been good at picturing the wolf as a bloodthirsty monster and therefore happy to forget what he might have done. But now.. Now the wolf was having fun with his friends too and he had almost no part in it. Worse, it meant that the wolf had emotions and a consciousness foreign to Remus’. And that’s what the unicorn’s blood argument was all about, wasn’t it? That the wolf could take over and exist instead of Remus. 

It’s why it had hurt Sirius so much to see Remus so eager to offer himself to whoever or whatever might be a threat to him. He was so used to blaming himself that he didn’t see the simple truth and the simple thing that he had to do to keep things from collapsing: Take care of himself. 

It’s alright though. Now Sirius can try new technics to show Remus exactly how important he is.As he looks shyly into Remus eyes right now, he vows to declare it in every kisses, to burn it into his skin in every caresses and to draw every embrace into a promise. 

Remus must feel that Sirius is losing grasp on their surroundings because he raises a brow, a silent question asking what Sirius has on his mind. Sirius wonders if Evans would be agreeable to do her Prefect rounds with someone else or even alone so that Sirius can kidnap Remus somewhere and make good of his new-found intentions. 

Sirius is still not quite sure where to stand regarding the Lily-Evans-Knows-Remus-Secret situation. There are worse people who could have heard them. But much like Snape - already a great case for horrible people who should absolutely not know about Remus but actually do - Lily is now a great reminder that Sirius fucked up again. For all his dedication in keeping Remus safe and saving Remus from himself, Sirius has to admit that he is quite terrible at the job right now. No one is perfect, he thinks looking at James and remembering their conversation in the Prefects Bathroom but everyone ought to just try a little harder and maybe … maybe that’s what James was saying all along. 

Then there’s the fact that Remus has been pretty silent about it.

Sirius raises his wand and casts a somewhat successful silencing spell. James’ head snaps up and both Peter and Remus look at him quizzically. Sirius turns to Remus.

‘What are you going to do about Evans?’ Asks Sirius calmly. 

‘What do you want him to do about it?’ Shoots James, attacking even before Remus gets to say anything. 

‘I don’t **want** him to do anything about it. I’m just wondering what the plan of action is. We’ve never had this situation before and Snape cursing us under his breath every time he crosses path with us doesn’t count.’ Explains Sirius.

‘Well… I don’t exactly like the idea of obliviating her. I’ll just talk to her, I think.’ Shrugs Remus. 

‘What exactly will you tell her?’ Insists Sirius, cocking his head sideway as if to better see through Remus. 

‘You said that she was happy to keep it secret and I’d like to thank her. Truth be told, I’m glad that she knows. She’s my friend and I know it’s dangerous for one more person to know but I trust her. Besides it is getting rather tedious to lie to her when I can’t go on patrols. It’ll make life easier for everyone.’ Smiles their friend. ‘It goes without saying that I won’t mention the Animagi. This isn’t my secret to tell.’ 

James nods and Peter mimics him, smiling at Remus. Sirius is surprised to see that he agrees too and leans back, silently musing over it.

‘What’s wrong, Sirius?’ Prompts Remus, sensing something is out of place. 

‘You can trust Lily, Sirius. I think she made it quite clear that she could be trusted with it.’ Offers James, ever so eager to defend her and misreading Sirius’ hesitation.

‘Well she used to be friend with Snape so I’ll need a bit more time before I fully buy into her perfection.’ Half jokes Sirius. 

This prompts James to straighten up and ready himself to list every reasons why Sirius not trusting Lily is wrong. Luckily Remus interjects before he gets the chance.

‘For once, I’d like everyone to remember that this has little to do with any of you. Like I said, she’s my friend.’ He removes a lock of sandy blond hair out of his eye and Sirius feels his inside liquefy as if it’s the first time he’s seeing Remus doing just that. 

‘You’re totally in charge of how you want to proceed here. But I thought that we’ve established that what concerns you concerns us, Moony.’ Counters Sirius. 

‘Padfoot is right. Anyone who learns about you and might be a risk to you, is our concern, Moony. ‘ He pauses, sighs and leans over the table, before adding solemnly; ‘And that goes beyond people discovering it because one of us is being an idiot. Everyone. Here in the castle or outside in the real world.’ 

Sirius suddenly gets irrationally scared of all the people who will most likely become a threat to Remus once he’ll be out of school. His eyes wander to the empty Slytherin table again but if he is truly honest with himself, he has to concede that outside, in the real world, they’ll have to worry about the Ministry and adults more than they’ll have to fear Snape and any of the future self proclaimed Death Eaters or whatever freaky name they are calling themselves these days. 

Remus smiles softly, some sort of emotion passing over his face. He nods.

‘I know, Prongs. I get that now. And I’m not challenging it.’ He looks briefly at Sirius before turning back to James and Peter. ‘What I mostly meant is that.. well I’m never given the chance to properly introduce anyone to the fact that I am what I am… and probably never really will given that it’s something that could kill them and well… It makes for a pretty crappy conversation anyway. And I’ll most likely be really happy to let you deal with possible threat to my life in the future. I know I can be naive.’ He looks at Sirius pointedly again and Sirius remembers the alcove very vividly. ‘But this one actually concerns a real friend of mine who is neither a threat nor a Marauder. And I’d like to have a chance to handle it the way I want to… no matter what you’ll have to say about it.’

Sirius nods and is about to confirm that they’ll let him deal with Evans when he sees a group of first and second years Slytherins make their way into the Great Hall, sounding more agitated than what is usually expected from kids coming for dinner. A slow satisfied smile wakes on his face. 

‘You do you, Moony. We’ll be there no matter what. Just.. Keep us into the loop.’ Remus nods.Sirius undoes the silencing spell and announces; ’Now gentlemen, I think it’s showtime.’

* * *

* * *

**Saturday Evening**

**Hogwarts Great Hall**

James smiles and turns around quickly to sneak a peek at the Slytherin table. He turns back and winks at Sirius before faking interest for his notes, mentally putting their previous conversation in a corner of his mind. After a few moments he curses his strategic choice of sitting since he deliberately placed himself back to the entertainment while he has to suffer Sirius snickering and commenting how the youngest Slytherins are looking exasperated and somewhat frazzled. He is about to kick his friend’s leg under the table when someone sits next to him. 

Looking up, he comes face to face with Lily, who is now settling herself contentedly and looking at Remus knowingly. 

‘You’ll have to let me know what spells you used. That’s impressive work.’ She says, eyes twinkling.

Three Animagi then shift to look accusingly at Remus who merely huffs a laugh and finally removes his hand from under the table, where James supposes it was somehow in contact with the hand that Sirius was also hiding under the table. He’s not even surprised. Remus opens up the book that he discarded previously. 

‘I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.’ He says without looking at her. 

She laughs. **Laughs**. And James gets a bit overwhelmed because Lily smells like a fresh meadow showered in sunlight and she is laughing and her shoulder almost touches his when she leans to talk to them as if she’s plotting something too. 

‘Sure. None of you actually know how most of the Slytherins furnitures ended up stuck on the ceiling, right? Stuck on the ceiling **and** upside down.’ This time she ends her sentence by looking pointedly at James who is surprised to see that there’s no glare, no reproof and no exasperation.She’s smirking. Merlin, this day is getting weirder and weirder. 

He’s still blinking at her when Sirius actually kicks him under the table. 

‘Ow!’ He glares at Sirius ‘What?’ 

Sirius gives a look that James translates into ‘All of you better stop acting like bloody trolls when she’s around! I swear it’s like you took several bludgers into the head.’ But James ignores him so he can focus on Lily, who is now openly mocking him with a teasing smile and James isn’t sure he is actually armed to deal with this side of Lily. 

‘Good evening, Evans. You look even lovelier than this morning.’ He flirts, in an attempt at covering his fluster.

‘Good evening, Potter. You look like you were marauding again.’ She continues without missing a beat.

‘Nope. We have no clue what you are on about. We were merely discussing my notes from the game.’ He tries, making a show of the Quidditch notes spread out in front of him. 

‘Funny. I didn’t actually see you at the game.’ She crosses her arms daring him, once again, to continue with the lie. Well it is marauders prank business and she might be the prettiest girl he ever met, he isn’t about to let her have it.

‘Sounds like you were looking for me, Evans. Interesting.’ He lets a slow flirtatious - or what he hopes to be flirtatious - smile spread on his face and is rewarded by her losing some of her composure. 

‘I…’ he can see the gear operating in her head and the idea that she actually had looked for him starts to look too plausible for him to fathom. ‘That’s nonsense. Your whole team was there and you weren’t. Marlene told me.’ She turns away from him to glare at Sirius. ‘You were also missing. And I’ve been asked to come and help getting their furniture down. **Someone** also booby trapped Severus’ bed with a dungbomb.’ She rolls her eyes.

‘Tell me more, Evans.’ Says Sirius bending forward absolutely gleeful now that he knows that his trap worked as intended. 

‘No. You might want to wipe that grin off your face. That alone is very telling and I’ve had to listen to Rosier tell your brother exactly what he’ll do to you if you ever walk past him alone.’ Lily warns, only making Sirius grin wider. 

Remus who was previously hiding a grin now looks up, worry in his eyes. James brushes it off. It’s not the first time the Slytherins have threatened them. It might be stupid but James would rather they threaten them because of a prank. At least this makes some kind of sense. House rivalry and petty teenage pranks might be silly but they are harmless. Having certain groups in the school hexing people left and right and potentially really hurting other students is the real danger. 

‘Like I said, we don’t know what you are talking about, Lily. But it sure sounds brilliant. Whoever is behind this has our respect.’ Smiles James. 

She rolls her eyes at him again and leans back. He hears giggling behind him and before he gets to turn, Marlene and Mary reach Lily and the Marauders. 

‘Boys, you’ve outdone yourselves.’ Says Mary, deep raspy voice as she sits next to Lily. 

‘As flattering as this is, we were just telling Evans that we have nothing to do with it.’ Says Sirius, failing at hiding his grin. 

‘Sure. There’s no way one boy alone did that and none of the girls dorm rooms have been touched so it rules out everyone who’s not a boy here.’ Says Marlene. She taps Lily’s shoulder and all three girls turn around to look at the Slytherin table again. Curiosity overcomes James and he turns back too. Half of the Slytherins are now sitting. Fourth and Fifth years almost all there and all sporting a similar range of emotions on their faces: anger, frustration and what James interprets as a call for vindication. 

James turns back and winks at the Marauders not realising that Lily turned with him and has caught it. 

‘It’s harmless.’ He offers. 

‘I know.’ She offers back. 

‘We all needed a touch of levity around here.’ He continues.

‘I’m not sure they agree with you on that. I -’ She’s cut off by Marlene gripping her shoulder.

‘Incoming.’ Marlene announces. 

Before James turns around again, Sirius nods at him and settles back into a nonchalant position, a familiar naughty glint in his eyes. 

‘Rosier. Mulciber. Evening. But isn’t your table on the other side of the hall?’ Sirius starts with. 

Rosier who shares the Black nobly handsome traits of long sleek dark hair and thin pale face with Sirius - James remembers Sirius mentioning his mother being born a Rosier before marrying into the Black family - is coming face to face with them, hands in fists and anger colouring his aristocratic complexion. He stops at level with Peter and James puts a comforting hand on his friend shoulder. He sees Marlene move away, most likely to sit with Mary and decides to somewhat shield Lily behind him too. Keep the attention on him and the Marauders. 

‘You think you are funny, Black?’ He spits. 

‘I’m hilarious. Ask everyone.’ Shoots Sirius.

Mulciber takes a step in front of Rosier. He is a good head above anyone else with a strong bust and looks like a bull. 

‘I’ll drag you to the dungeons myself.’ 

‘That’s a little presumptuous of you. At least buy me dinner first.’ Jokes Sirius and James snorts. Rosier and Mulciber both look at James.

‘What seems to be the trouble, mates?’ Asks James, fake innocence pouring out of him. 

‘You know why we are here, Potter. I’ll have no remorse beating the counter spell out of you.’ Snaps Mulciber.

‘Oi! Why does Sirius get an invite to the dungeons and I only get a beating? Am I not worthy of the dungeons?’ He says affronted. 

‘They still think I can be made into a Slytherin probably. There’s no hope for you, mate. You were never a Black.’ Sighs Sirius. 

‘You’re not a Black anymore. You are nothing but scum.’ Announces Rosier. 

‘He’s a Potter.’ Challenges James. Sirius startles and Remus puts a hand behind his back. 

‘That’s still scum.’ Snarls Mulciber. 

‘Alright. As entertaining as this exchange is getting’ starts Lily behind James, ‘Let’s all take a deep breath. Rosier, Mulciber, please join your table. Unless you have proof that they are behind what happened in your dorms, there’s nothing else you can do right now. If you or anyone else can prove it, I’m sure Slughorn will be more than happy to take care of them and their detentions. I promise to help with that actually. In the meantime, dinner awaits.’ 

James turns back toward the table in order to angle himself so he can see her better. 

‘You’ll help with detentions?’ He asks sarcastically. 

‘Don’t get cocky.’ She answers before standing up. 

‘Shut up, Mudblood! We don’t need your help. You couldn’t even undo what they did. What kind ofa Prefect are you?’ Attacks Mulciber. 

‘Take that back!’ Growls James as Sirius shoots up from his seat and takes out his wand and Mary and Marlene start calling Mulciber names. 

‘For Salazar’ sake! Calm down everyone!’ Shoots Lily starting forward. She looks undisturbed but James can feel anger pouring out of her. The insult used to be whispered and indirect. Nowadays, people seem to think they can get away with saying words like mudblood in the Great Hall at dinner without consequences realises James. 

‘What about your Prefects?’ asks Peter, visibly as shaken as James at hearing them use the slur so openly.

‘That’s right.’ Says Remus calmly, grabbing Sirius’ wand hand and bringing it down, forcing Sirius to sit back down. Sirius continues to glare daggers at the two Slytherins but Remus just merely grabs the wand and puts it back into his own robes and meets no protests from the other boy. ‘I don’t see why any of us should be insulted if even the Slytherin Prefects are unable to come up with a solution either. There’s no good crying over split potion now. Wait for Slughorn and get out of our space. You’ll be spoiling dinner.’ 

‘You’ll pay for this.’ Says Rosier, eyes dark with rage now giving his full attention to Remus. 

‘So you said already.’ Says Lily. ‘Either let a professor deal with it or I’ll make sure they know you go around threatening people and inciting violence. Don’t make me repeat myself, I see Professor McGonagall coming our way. Should we let her know now?’ 

Rosier turns around and sure, James can see the entire teacher body making their way through the Great Hall. Slughorn seems a bit disheveled and goes to the Slytherin table before getting surrounded by the oldest Slytherins, all demanding that the situation gets corrected as soon as possible while their Transfiguration teacher makes her way toward the teachers table. When she reaches it, her eyes zeroes in on the small group gathered, taking stock of Rosier and Mulciber in their green Slytherin robes facing Lily and a half standing James.

* * *

Lily watches McGonagall raise a brow, most likely wondering what the whole situation means as she sits down. Lily nods, squares her shoulders and turns back to them, feeling James eyes heavy on her. He doesn’t sit back down but comes to stand next to her, first looking back at the teacher table and nodding at their professor too. He’s then again shoulder to shoulder with her and she doesn’t know how to feel about it exactly. 

‘Should we?’ Lily asks again, determined to see this altercation end now. It was fun and she herself almost fell down laughing when she saw the expressions of the Sixth Years students when they came down their dorm, Severus swearing loudly mere seconds after the dung bomb had exploded on him. She’d been exasperated but the spell had been such a work of precision that she had found herself happy to get a chance at reversing it. Slughorn had mentioned that there probably was a time-related spell on the charms given their inability to reverse anything and Lily, who had no doubts on who did this, was in awe of the Marauders talents with charms. 

Rosier just grabs Mulciber’s arm and drags him away.

‘Is that what you call levity, Potter?’ She sighs. 

‘We try. It’s not our fault they have no sense of humour whatsoever. It’s fine though. We can laugh for them.’ Winks James as they start to sit back down with their friends. 

Lily turns quickly to make sure Rosier and Mulciber are now sitting at their table. 

‘How long will the spell last?’ She asks worried, watching them reach their sits.

‘How long did you set it to last Wormtail?’ Asks James and Lily turns to stare at Peter. She had never realised that he was good at time spells. 

‘They should be able to sleep in their beds tonight don’t worry.’ Peter laughs and smiles at Lily. James shit-eating grin comes back and he aims it at Sirius and Remus who are now back to feeling no remorse over what they did and finding themselves very clever. 

Lily laughs despite herself and James huffs a laugh of his own. She looks at the four of them with a newfound affection that surprises her. 

‘Alright. If push comes to shove, I’ll feel no remorse to give you detentions for it but for now I’m willing to let it slide.’ She announces.

‘Does Moony get a detention too? Or does he get another Prefect free pass?’ Asks Sirius. 

She glares at him and at Remus who’s still holding Sirius’ wand. Sirius seems to realise it too as he shoves his friend in the ribs and tries to catch it. Remus’ hand shoots up and they engage in a battle of fits and tickles. 

While Marlene and Mary are commenting on the wrestling taking place in front of them, Peter rolls his eyes and stares at the clock wondering how dinner is not yet in front of him most likely, while James turns to Lily. 

‘You know, when you became a Prefect, I didn’t foresee that you’d end up having to save our butts so much. Getting detentions from you, yes. Being saved from wannabe Death Eaters no. I should thank you. I am thanking you actually.’ He says half smiling and half frowning. 

‘I am as surprised as you. But if you are truly grateful, might I suggest that you refrain from doing anything shady for a couple weeks. I need to sleep in eventually. Apparently you can’t be left alone during your detentions either and I don’t even want to think about that unicorn again.’ She shakes her head. 

‘That was quite a week.’ He acquiesces. 

He looks at Remus who is now laughing so hard he is crying while Sirius is coming up from the floor, his wand finally in his hand. There’s worry in James eyes but affection and she remembers the sound of his voice when he told both Snape and herself what they would get if any of them threatened his friend’s life. Lily is overwhelmed suddenly with some admiration for the young man sitting next to her. She’s only ever seen - or wanted to see she thinks - the loud mouthed, arrogant and immature young boy that had tormented her since their first year. She realises, much like she realised that Snape wasn’t who she thought he was, that prejudices could work both ways. Nothing was totally black or white. And if this week had taught her anything is that she had to learn not to take things at face value either. 

Her childhood best friend had let her know for a long time now what he believed and who he preferred to follow, only making her an exception because to him she was maybe different or perhaps because he truly had cared for her. And she had chosen not to see it because she too had cared for him. Probably more than she had cared for anyone in her entire life. But Severus was angry, bitter and feeling scared had made him cruel. 

James Potter still had that annoying energy and enthusiasm for mischief, games and parties. He was everywhere she looked, beating her in class with no effort, acting like he was Merlin’s gift to the Wizarding World and his behaviour toward her all these years had been immature and borderline obsessive. He had been a jerk most of the time with bullying tendencies. Yet, even her had to admit that she’d seen him change and grow somehow this year. Giving every instances of foolish behaviour a sour taste in her mouth as she had unconsciously hoped that he had truly changed. And since she wasn’t talking to Severus anymore and part of it was because of James Potter, then he had had to suffer her anger and disappointment. She had given James more attention because if Severus could turn so bad then maybe James could have turned really good. 

And none of this was wrong about James nor Severus. But it wasn’t all there was to them either. Severus could still choose his friends and hobbies to not involve persecuting people he saw inferior to him. That had nothing to do with Lily and she had to accept that. And James had saved Severus from the werewolf. He almost died saving a life and doing a selfless act for someone who had an agenda of violence and bigotry. James was a jerk who couldn’t flirt to save his life and made terrible jokes. He had bullied her friend. But he was ready to lay down his life for his best friend and made Sirius his brother when he found himself without a home. 

Remus Lupin was the kindest person she had the chance to meet. He liked to drink tea more than anyone she knew and always looked surprised when he couldn’t close his bag because he had too many books in it. Girls would sit next to him first because he looked safe and quiet. He had an addiction to chocolate, she thought smiling softly looking at her friend. And amidst of all this, Remus Lupin was a werewolf too. Every month he turned into a monster and people outside probably would never let him have a normal life. 

She herself was the smartest in her year. And she was Muggle born. She saw herself as kind and open and driven. But she was stubborn and had a temper too. And she knew that she usually was seeing what she wanted to see until it was too late.

She had heard about two boys and a unicorn and had immediately assumed they were harming it. Now looking at James Potter and Sirius Black putting the food she hadn’t realised had finally appeared on the table on their plates and watching Peter trying to convince Remus to let him have more of the mash potatoes, Lily wonders if they weren’t actually saving it from whatever was inside that forest. 

James turns and offers the mash potatoes plate to her. She smiles softly making him frown.

‘What’s wrong?’ He asks, quizzically.

‘What do you mean?’ She takes the plate.

‘You were looking at me like I had suddenly grown antlers.’ He jokes.

‘I’m seeing a lot of things in a new light today.’ She confesses. 

‘Is it good or is it bad?’ He looks worried and puts down his fork.

‘Good.’ She looks up at him. ‘And bad too I guess. But it could be worse.’ 

‘Worse how?’ He is now staring at her as if knowing what she had to say was the most important thing. 

Lily shrugs. ‘Well I could have stayed blind forever. And I think it’s worse. Seeing as most of us stay in our beliefs and how … well it’s not going to help us once we are out of school, you know.’

James nods and looks at his friends, back at the Slytherin tables and then at Lily. He thoughtfully keeps quiet for a moment, taking the liberty to put more food onto her plate before doing the same to his. 

‘I’ve been thinking about all this for a while. Pranking has been a bit harder on me this year. As much as we do it for fun, it’s now clear that people are being literal and extreme these days.’

‘Then why do you continue?’ She asks, perplexe.

‘Because for the most part I know my intentions. Because it’s something that I like to do that isn’t hurting people. Not like… not like what I did to Snape last year. That wasn’t a prank. That was mean and I never apologised to you for it. I never apologised to him either. So yeah. I am sorry, Lily.’ 

Lily nods and holds his gaze as he clears his throat waiting for her to say something. And she finds that it’s not easy to forgive him but that she wants to do it anyway.

‘Alright, Potter. Thank you.’ 

He nods back. 

‘But yes, I’m not going to stop being a Marauder. Pranking people is what we do. They are not going to drive us away from who we are. I won’t let them. There’s only one kind of chaos allowed in this castle and it’s ours! Outside maybe they’ll be stronger and meaner and we’ll see then. But in Hogwarts? They’re not in the clear yet.’ 

She smiles at him, hearing his call for action and rebellion against the bigotry and the reality of the outside world. They’ll worry about it later. 

She’s about to ask him again how they managed to stuck all the furniture on the Slytherin ceiling when she hears a loud bang and an even louder shriek. Lily turns around and Peeves is maniacally laughing above the Slytherin and Ravenclaw tables,brandishing a weird shaped objects she can’t make out above his head. Filch is running madly toward him yelling and cursing the poltergeist. 

‘Oh Merlin! I have a bad feeling about this.’ Exclaims Remus behind her. 

She turns around in time to see him eye Sirius with reproach. 

‘What is happening?’ James asks turning around. 

‘It’s a surprise from Padfoot.’ Sighs Remus.

Sirius merely winks at them all. 

Suddenly Peeves starts chanting ‘Together! Together! Here’s a shower of glitter!!’ 

Before shooting giant gushes of glitters onto the students below him from what Lily finally recognises as a glitter gun. There’s an uproar of outrage as people realise that the glitter covers literally anything it touches and sticks to people, furniture and floors. Slytherins are the most heavily hit and start shooting Peeves with spell which propels him toward the rest of the Hall. 

Sirius is laughing so hard he is almost falling again and he catches Remus’ arm and collapses laughing into the other boy’s arms.Peter hunches over his food to protect it, yelling even though Peeves is still far away from the Gryffindor table and everyone with a brain starts emptying the room. No one stops to cast a shielding charm and the professors come down to try and stop the devilish spirit. It’s pure chaos. Mcgonagall marches toward the Gryffindor table, fuming with rage and yelling: 

‘Black, Potter, Pettigrew and Lupin! You will undo this NOW!’ 

James turns to her laughter in his eyes with his usual naughty and cocky grin. He’s beautiful of course and this time she doesn’t feel angry about it or not completely anyway. He shrugs and she rolls her eyes. 

‘I don’t think I’ve ever seen you laugh at our pranks’ says James, radiating happiness.

‘Frame it. You are not likely to see it again!’ She lies.

‘We’ll see about that, Lily.’ He says before their professor finally reaches them and gives them all detentions.

She sighs; it may have been the end of the world as she saw it, but she hoped that it was also the beginning of a beautiful relationship.

The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you enjoyed it. I feel so happy to have finally posted my first fic here. I actually had stopped writing for many years and this got me back on track. 
> 
> Here were the prompts that inspired the plot.
> 
> Prompt One, End your story with this sentence:
> 
> She sighed; it may have been the end of the world, but it was also the beginning of a beautiful relationship
> 
> Prompt Two: Three nouns, Three things to add in your story.
> 
> A unicorn hunter, a planet entirely inhabited by cats, a glitter gun.
> 
> And yes, I was listening to Taylor Swift 1989 while writing at some point and it then made total sense to use this song as a title. 
> 
> I'm currently starting a new Marauders//HP time travel thingy so if you have suggestions or critical comments from this one, I'd be super happy to read them. 
> 
> Be well!

**Author's Note:**

> English isn't my mother tongue so I apologise if I ever butcher it.


End file.
